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Who Am I?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by MajorTom, Nov 3, 2014.

  1. MajorTom

    Regular Member

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    So I'm 16 now, I came out as bisexual the last day of school even though I wasn't completely certain of my sexuality, I've explored a lot since but I still don't know who the hell I am, what the hell I'm doing here, I feel like I don't belong here. I've never had a boyfriend or girlfriend, never had sex, never even kissed and since I came out I've finally found a set of friends I feel comfortable with and I've grown so much confidence and I've hugged and danced with a few boys but nothing more, I suppose I've had opportunity but how the hell I could possibly kiss anyone I don't know.

    My life from the view of any other person must look rather faultless but the not knowing is killing me. When everyone else around me has had an abundance of relationships and is quite confident in who and what they are I don't have the faintest clue and this chaos is killing me.
     
  2. Chriswe

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    I know how you feel. I used to feel really bad about not knowing who I was myself. My solution was google, LGBTQ+ websites, watching documentaries about it, watching people on YouTube that's in the LGBTQ+ community and... Patience. You're still young, you have time, even though it might not feel like it.

    And let me tell you that a lot of 16 year olds have never had sex, been in a realtionship or kissed anyone, so you're really not alone.

    I wish you the best. Peace
     
  3. MessieM

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    I've never had sex lol! I hardly get through it all myself.
    I don't know either… It says bisexual under my name but really i have absolutely no clue… I just know I like girls but I just have some awkward feelings for guys as well that just really complicates stuff, but it shouldn't. Why would it complicate stuff? Why can I not just be in the grey zone? But I know it's not that simple, and the fact that I'm not happy with that "label" must suggest something is not right.
    I'm just constantly assessing myself, and I can't just let myself BE, i just over think and over think it all. Every single thought that goes through my head has to be sent back to be analysed again and again in my brain, like i'm looking for proof for something I already know.
    And sometimes I don't think I like girls at all… I'm just looking to much into it. But then I think that's crazy, and I'm back in the circle again. This chaos is killing me too.
     
  4. MajorTom

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    But what do I do? I don't know what to do anymore.
     
  5. iiimee

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    I suggest you try to embrace whatever you are. Bisexual people love both genders, and it can be said if you feel attraction to both you are probally bisexual. Try saying the words a few time, and try to build up confidence. If you're still not sure if you're bisexual or not, you can try to look up how you feel, and see how it defines your sexuality. People often confuse bisexuality with pansexuality. If you are certain, and know they'll be supportive, tell your parents. They might have suggestions for what to do now, and seeing a counselour or going to lgbt groups can help alot.
     
  6. Chriswe

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    Do you have a LGBTQ+ support group anywhere close to where you live? That could help. Meeting more bisexual / questioning people can really make a difference.
     
  7. MajorTom

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    Doubt we have anything of the sort round here. I wish I was just confident enough to explore my sexuality with people though but I'm not.
     
  8. iiimee

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    Look online for LGBT groups. There usually is one. Also, don't feel down about that! I was tempted to try to explore my sexuality with a girl once, see how it went, but I knew inside I didn't like girls, and so I found out on my own. Think about it this way- Could you ever "love" a guy like that? Or could you ever do that with a girl? Some people can't imagine them with either sexually, and some with both, or just one. Everyone is different. Try to figure out what YOU are.
     
  9. MajorTom

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    Gender:
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    I know I could have a relationship with either sex, I'm just not sure how things would work out sexually.