I was sure I was gay, but I've had my doubts recently. Ok so I know there is a part of me that is gay. I have been in love with a guy before and have had several crushes on guys. I haven't had any crushes on girls though (I think), though I do have occasionally have small feelings for one or two. However I have sexual thoughts for both guys and girls (for guys it's more 'he's hot and cute and I would like him in bed' and for girls it just happens for no reason). It's killing me, because I'm beginning to feel that I'm not gay and I'm straight, but then there's a part of me that wants to be gay. I'm really confused and scared. Any help? :icon_sad:
Remember, there are other sexualities besides 'gay' or 'straight'- bisexuality or pansexuality for example. You don't even have to put a label on it at all! It sounds like you're putting a lot of pressure on yourself to fit into one of only two labels. You really don't need to choose between 'gay' and 'straight'. If it helps, from what you've said, it sounds like you are sexually attracted to men to some degree. It doesn't sound like you're what most people would identify as "straight". Have you considered that you might like men and women?
Sexuality is only one aspect of who you are. Sometimes its ok to just be confused. You dont need to come to any conclusions *right now* about who you are or your sexuality, particularly if youre young. Just enjoy your life and dont let this issue loom over you in an oppressive way. Maybe take some time to focus on other things.
It does sound like you may be Bi - not straight, but not fully gay either, and that's completely normal! Also, bisexuals can feel like they prefer men over women (but still like both) or vice versa, or go through phases. Have you dated yet? I think once you actually get to meet a person (whichever gender) and get closer to them, it'll be easier to tell if you're gay, bi or straight. Good luck!
Thanks! @Fox3 I've dated the guy and we go to school together I think I might be bisexual. About Kinsey 4.
Do you think I'm going through the kinda opposite of hocd? I'm scared of being straight, even though I think I am probably a Kinsey 3 to 4.
I agree that the physical appearance of someone gives you the initial attraction, but who that person is will be the main factor in why you're interested in them in then first place. At least that's what I think, and is from my own experience.
I feel more of a personal connection with guys, though. I feel like I'd like to keep girls at a friend level. I don't think I would like being in a relationship with one.
I like the kinsey scale but I don't think 0 to 6 is enough. I think there should be milions of points on the scale because absolutely everyone is different. If thats true then accepting society's very limited number of accepted labels is ridiculous. Personally I've no idea where I am on that scale right now but it's cool. You, like I, seem likely to be bisexual. Just live your life, when you meet the right person you'll know it's the right person. Male or female. Who cares? In the meantime, you don't need a label gay, straight, bisexual etc.