Hi all. So recently (year plus) I realized that my attraction doesn't focus solely on men. I fell hard for a girl I met and the idea of being with a woman lodged itself into my head and hasn't left since. What made this a bit difficult was that I was in 3-year relationship with a man. But now fastforward a year and I am in a situation we I have separated with this man - not only because of my sexuality sways (although I have not enjoyed penetration in a very very very long time) but it is a big part of it. I love him still but have little interest in being sexual with him. The reality of the situation now is that I'm about to be single after four years (still sorting the practicalities of ending the relationship out) and I'm petrified to put it mildly. I know I don't have to, and shouldn't, rush into anything - but at the same time I feel huge amount of anxiety over wanting to be with a woman (maybe this specific woman). But I don't know how. I have no idea how to have sex with a woman. I have never myself had an orgasm in an intercourse (part of the reason why it grew tiresome to be with a man who happened to like intercourse a lot) and only a handful of times in oral sex. I just don't know. And I know it probably sounds stupid.. and probably it is. And ofcourse it's not only about sex. I'm out to few of my friends and they have all been very good with it, but majority of my friends don't know. And man I'm old to be doing this, 32, and that's another reason why I'm a bit scared - so new in the game so late. In the end I really don't know what my point here was.. I guess if someone can relate and tell me it's going to be better that would be lovely. Even so, thanks if you read this far.
32? If you read some more posts here on the forum you'd realize it's not that late. And you may be new in the game but it doesn't mean you're worse. Try to relax, okay? It doesn't matter you have no idea how to have sex with a woman now, just let me tell you that you'll know what to do once you're in the bedroom with her. :icon_wink So yeah, it's going to get better... much better. (*hug*)
I can relate in a way. . I'm28 and am now realizing my own sexual orientation. I know what you mean by it being late in the game. I think it might be a lot easier to come out at an earlier age. However sometimes people don't really start to figure themselves out until they get older ot xprience a situation that changes how ty think about certain things..
Don't worry, nothing you have said is stupid! I've known I was attracted to girls since I was 12/13, and I still am not sure on how all that works. It's mostly just inexperience. From the tips I've gotten from others, the best things to do are 1) Fantasize. Just sit and think about what you would like to do/ have done to you. I kind of ran through the list of possible part combinations (fingers, mouth, genitals, etc) and see how I felt about it. It sounds silly, but it helped me alot. and 2) When you start talking to a woman you are romantically/ sexually interested in, maybe sexy talk on the phone/ on line/ sexting? I'm not very good at that, but someone with more experience maybe can lead the way on that one. Also, there is a forum called "Out later in life" and while I don't think you are old by any stretch of the imagination, there are lots of women in your situation that are 30,40, heck, 50+ that are just realizing they have feelings for other women. They are definitely worth talking to. ^_^
