Hello. I am 21 years old. I am a virgin. I have never had a serious boyfriend and have never been in love with a boy. I have been intimate with boys, and every time I just felt awkward like i didnt know what to do and it didnt seem right. I find males to be physically attractive and I have always imagined myself with a boy, especially in the future when i start a family, but I have yet to meet a boy that I really have those feelings for. I recently questioned if I was asexual - not attracted to either sex - but then i had my first lesbian experience. It was completely spontaneous, but it actually felt okay. I don't know if its because I didn't feel the pressure to go a step farther (obviously I can't literally have sex with a girl) and I was working with something I'm familiar with, or if I really am a lesbian?? I am way confused. I dont think I am attracted to girls physically, but maybe just sexually?? Please lend me some advice!
I thought I was asexual for awhile... mostly because I still had embedded in my psyche that there was simply no way that I was gay.
Physical attraction isn't everything. A mistake that people make is that when they realize they have sexual thoughts about the same gender, they assume that they aren't straight. This is not always the case. So from your post, I can infer that you're basing your conclusion on to little information. As you grow older, you'll realize where your feelings lie. If you end up liking someone, it'll be because you are attracted to who they are, and less on how they look. Same sex experiences are quite normal for those of who question their orientation, so with time, you'll realize who you are.
I'm in a similar situation so I get your confusion. Maybe it helps to think about what you really want or what you would be ok with. Can you see yourself falling in love with a man/a woman? If you realise that you're straight but don't want to have sex with men, that's fine, too! Don't let people pressure you into doing anything you don't want. I agree with Jax12, it probably just takes some time to figure out who you are and what you want, at least I can say that that's definitely true for me. Just one more thing, I don't mean to be rude in correcting you, but you can literally have sex with a girl. Sex doesn't have to involve a penis. I'm not criticising you personally, I just think that some lesbian couples might be a bit offended if people tell them that they can't have "real" sex.
Orientation aside " who says to girls can't have sex ?" sex is just not a penis and vagina you know .
