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Does this make sense?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by lostboy78, Dec 9, 2014.

  1. lostboy78

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    I am in the throes of questioning my orientation, have my entire life; married for 12 years, 37 years old.

    I am much more physically attracted to men than women and they always steal my attention at the beach, stores, etc. It's about 80% to 20% - I find women attractive but can say with confidence that guys are hotter / cuter to me.

    Despite my attraction, I have a hard time imagining being intimate with another man.

    It kind of scares me. What if it doesn't work? What if I 'came out' and then it didn't feel right? Could this be more of a fetish then anything?

    Any advice / thoughts would be helpful!
     
  2. lostboy78

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    Guess it doesn't haha ...
     
  3. Fafner

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    Hey man, it makes total sense to me! I've just recently come to terms with the fact that I'm attracted to guys as well, but I still have a hard time imagining being intimate with another guy.

    I've been wondering about the same thing! I feel like I'm still conflicted about it, so I think it's just about accepting it. Just need to give it some time :slight_smile:
     
  4. SouthernGeek

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    Hi lostboy,

    I used to be where you are. For me my feelings haven't been constant. As I acknowledge one "level" of attraction, it seems to allow myself to think of the next level. I don't know what I'm doing, either, so don't consider me an expert. I think take things slowly and allow yourself time to get in touch with who you are.

    I'm 45 and just had my first sexual experience with a guy 2 years ago. Since then I'v made out with a total of 5 guys. It has only gotten to the point of oral. The first guy I was with kissed me. It was okay, but I was thinking maybe I'm not gay because there were no "sparks." Well, last month the guy I made out with kissed me and I'm still processing what it felt like. Oh boy, there were most certainly sparks.
     
  5. lostboy78

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    I've been with 4 women in my life, and have enjoyed them - enjoy sex, enjoy their bodies ( thought not as much as a guy's body ) - I'm not sure if I recall ever feeling sparks .... it was 'nice' but sparks? I guess that's what I'm looking for ... what we all look for ...
     
  6. DinelodiiGitli

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    You could just be bisexual with a preference for guys, bicurious or homo/heteroflexible.
    Maybe none of the above. Don't worry so much about labels, take the time to focus on how you feel and then work out what to call it. :slight_smile:

    Blessings, best wishes and good vibes to you.