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Any other explanations?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by SquirrelGirl, Dec 10, 2014.

  1. SquirrelGirl

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    I'm not really sure if I'm bi or a lesbian. I'm kinda of leaning toward the middle or biromantic homosexual (not that I'm happy about it). I know I'm attracted to girls but with a couple of guys, one in particular right now, I think I'm attracted to too. I think this because every time I'm with these guys I always start planning a future together, wanting to spend all our time together, introducing him to my parents, etc. I've also been in love with a guy before (he was an ass though). So I know I can like anyone that way based on their personality.

    I'm not sure if I was sexually attracted to these guys though. I'd always feel drawn to them, like wanting to touch them, hold their hand. One of them I was desperate to kiss in the middle of the room at work in front of other people. The other one I was at a party with and he pulled me into the other room and picked me up, pressed me against a wall and kissed me and I felt my stomach flip over and I wanted him really bad. Whenever I've had sex with guys though it's always been a bit lacklustre (I have a hard time enjoying myself) but it's been exactly the same when I've had sex with girls (though that was stupid drunken experimentation.

    Does anyone have any as to whether I'm attracted to these guys and not a lesbian. I've been told by certain people that anyone in those situations would be turned on (if they were flirting with someone). Is that true? Could it be that I have daddy issues since these guys were all 15+ years older than me?
     
  2. SeerOfHeart

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    You sound almost like you could be somewhere on the asexual spectrum? Not that I'm an expert on that by any means, but I mean... I'm pretty gay personally, and while I haven't had sex yet, I'm definitely not turned off by girls. If you were a lesbian, you probably wouldn't find sex with girls lackluster as well. I can't offer much more than that since I'm not asexual and don't identify anywhere else on the scale currently, but I think it'd be worth checking out!
     
  3. SquirrelGirl

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    Thanks for the response I'll look into that. I was wondering though if maybe I just wasn't comfortable enough to enjoy myself with anyone. I am attracted to girls, not really any of the girls I've slept with though. I think that because I've been questioning so long it's messed up everything really. Did it sound to you though like I was attracted to guys? I keep on doubting it.
     
  4. SeerOfHeart

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    I hope it helps! I think that your level of comfort could definitely play a role in all of this, but unfortunately I don't think I can really help you all that much with that one since I haven't really had any similar experiences.

    To me, it did sound like you're attracted to guys from what you wrote, at least romantically if not sexually. Of course, I can't give you a 100% definite answer, but the feelings you described about guys are things I've thought about the genders/people I've been attracted to as well!
     
  5. SquirrelGirl

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    Great thank you!