Heyo, So I'm currently a questioning female. If I were to ever come out anytime soon, I'd most likely come out as bi. I have had boyfriends, and in the beginning of high school, I did have crushes on guys. There was a period of 3 years where i had no crush --not on a guy nor on a girl. The next crush was a girl, and I do notice girls more while I'm in public, and I'd say more than I notice guys. Though, considering history, I find it possible for me to see a guy in public and get butterflies, but it has been a long time. My question to you all is did you first consider yourself bi? (I could see sexual orientation being put on a spectrum, somewhat like the myers-briggs personality traits, do you agree?) :icon_wink
Short answer: yes. Had no idea I was actually a lesbian until I had my first sexual experience with a woman.
if i can offer a, mostly male, point of view. i identify as BI and my attraction has proven to be somewhat fluid. for the past several months i have been more attracted to men while i was more attracted to women before. my point is if you feel an attraction to both, or more, then if you want to identify as bi, go for it. if later you feel that you are in fact lesbian, then go for that too. it is up to you, this is your dance to your own music.:eusa_danc
I originally thought I was Bi, and originally thought I was gender neutral, but then I discovered that being Transgender existed, and the wonderfull trans world was exposed to me. Now I (think) im Pansexual, and know im female. Id say just explore and learn.
I thought for a long time I was "maybe a little bi" and used that to rationalize away and ignore any feelings I had for women. I told myself so long as I liked men too I didn't need to deal with those feelings. I have had feelings for men but they aren't quite like what I feel for women and it's taken some time for me to start to understand that. I agree sexuality is a spectrum rather than a black and white binary system. Are you familiar with the Kinsey scale?
Nope. But that's because at that point I thought sexuality (like gender I'm embarrassed to confess) was binary. I thought you were gay, or you were straight. But to be fair, I was 11... Obviously now I know that nothing in terms of gender or sexuality is ever binary, and all the better for it!
I did at first because I always heard being attracted to the same sex was a phase and that most people's sexuality changes and they become straight or learn to like the opposite sex. So I just label myself bisexual because I thought I d wait for the right guy.
I thought I was bi initially and was actually fairly sexually active with women. It was... fine--not like it is in the songs and the movies but then what is, right? Then I had an encounter with a guy I was attracted to--nothing serious, he got drunk and kissed me. And my legs literally gave out and as we laid there limbs all intertwined on the floor of the lobby of my building I knew that everything I had had with women wasn't real--because this wasn't like that but with a guy, this was totally different. This was exactly how it was in the songs and the movies. Something clicked inside me and I haven't been with or even looked at a woman that way for over twenty years.
I had considered myself bi for a long time through Jr. High and high school. All throughout elementary school I only got crushes on girls and then in 6th grade I befriended I guy I fell head over heels for. It was then I confirmed to myself that I was at least bi, since I had a major crush on a girl at that time too. It's such a complex thing though. I've honestly never been sexually attracted to girls, but I've fallen pretty hard romantically for them and this is what confused me when I was figuring out what exactly my sexuality was in high school. My history's kind of been like yours; I haven't had a crush on the opposite sex in a little while, but it could certainly happen I'm sure. Probably less likely now since I get crushes on guys way more for some reason. I'm not sure what happens as we get older though. It seems like for me I got a lot of crushes on girls when I was a kid and now (21 y/o) it's just completely flipped to guys. Don't ask me why
I considered myself bi when I was obsessing about whether I was actually attracted to girls. Identifying as bi seemed like a good compromise. It was way better than identifying as questioning. Later I discovered HOCD and it makes a lot more sense than being bi or questioning. At least when it comes to my situation.
