Basically, when I'm out and about or at school etc. I'll have moments where they support my gayness. I was stretching my arms behind my head and leaning back and thought about doing that typical stretch and put your arm around someone move to the guy next to me while subconsciously thinking how nice it'd be. Then I just kinda sat in a small shock about how gay that was and the fact that it was subconscious. You see, when I'm at home, and I can think about this stuff alone and quietly, I feel like I will never fit with anyone guy or girl. Whenever I'm at home, I always think "maybe I am straight, or..." But when I'm away from home I'll always look for/at cute boys and just kind of acknowledge the girls. And things like the arm move example happen. Then when I'm home I think that maybe I'm not gay or that I'll never find someone like me. Psychological issue or something?
