What orientation am i? I'm so confused and stressed

Hello everyone,
I dont know what my orientation is even though I believe to be a straight 18 yr old guy. I have no problem with gay people, I have 2 gay people in my family, and I treat them like everyone else and think they should be able to do whatever makes them happy, but it's something that I never wanted for myself. I always thought i was straight, had huge crushes on girls all throughout school, (which were crushes as in I wanted to kiss them, I didnt just wanna be friends with them). I always found girls attractive, used to see naked women in movies, books, internet, try to find ways to even drill a whole into the girls locker room, see a cute girl with her tits half out and get insanely turned on, and I still do. But i also constantly worry that I am gay. I used to watch gay porn for a while after straight porn wouldnt fill the job as much, then moved onto more kind of different stuff. I finally realized that it was actually gay that I was watching it, even though it seems pretty obvious, it never dinged on me. Even though I got aroused by it, I never desired to be in the situation in the porn, never once imagined myself as one of the people, either taking or giving, and always found it disturbing and felt honestly violated afterwords. Eventually when it dinged on me that gay porn is gay to watch, Its like i had an epiphany and said I'm gonna stop watching this. I felt like i was getting gayer, and none of it felt right to me, I still never had crushes on guys or wanted to have sex with them, but i began getting a lot of anxiety about it and questioned my sexuality with every guy i see. It's been a year since i started stressing about my sexuality, and it still doesnt seem to make sense for me. I stopped watching porn for a while, and one year later, today, i can sit here and still stress about my sexuality all hours of the day. I think the only reason I wouldve been aroused by gay porn is because it was something taboo, different, and just new. Also, I was always picked on by every guy in school growing up, making me feel like I wasnt good enough, so maybe thats where it comes from too. Today I test myself to see if im attracted to guys and get aroused by naked men, but I can go through pages of naked pictures of men and not be turned on at all. Even though i can see naked men and dont become turned on, I still constantly worry that I'll become aroused by them, and test myself more. I just finished before writing this looking at pages of naked guys on the internet, and I remained flaccid the whole time, which doesnt seem like something a gay guy would be able to do. The thing is I am still turned on by women. I can just be sitting bored, thing of a girl riding me, and get insanely turned on. I just watched the hangover last night and was trying to see what everyone's big deal is with bradley cooper, and couldnt get it besides he looks like he works out, but then I got aroused when the stripper took her tit out to feed the baby. Although this happens to me, I still stress about my sexuality constantly, even though I dont get aroused by naked men anymore, have never had a crush on a guy before, and have no desire to be in a relationship at all with a guy. The thought of having to spend the rest of my life with a guy is painful to me, and not because of what other people would say, but because there would always be something missing. Now although I say all of this, I still see good looking guy in public and my mind suddenly goes into analyzing everything, am i attracted to him, would i get aroused by him if he was naked, all of that, even though i would never want to do anything with him. I feel like I am just stressing myself out way too much, because as soon as I start stressing out in the day and questioning everything, I can say goodbye to my libido for the day and I find it hard to get attracted to anything, even women.
So if you are still reading this, all i ever wanted was to grow up, meet a beautiful woman, have an awesome sex life, get married, have kids, and just grow old together. And I still feel like i can, but this constant questioning and analyzing of my sexuality drives me insane and makes me feel like I dont even know who i am anymore.

 

Thanks, the way my stressing starts in some day is when I dont get aroused by a situation the way I feel like I should. Like if I see boobs or something and dont get turned on instantly, it automatically makes my anxiety turn on then it will instantly make me check out every guy I see to see if I have some sort of attraction to them since I didnt get turned on at the moment to a woman. Then I will test myself to naked men and if I'm not aroused, it will make me happy again and normal until something causes me to think "I wonder if i would be aroused by a man right now". Then sometimes if its bad I continue to test myself for a couple days, and after I keep testing myself and getting more into stuff I would normally find gross, it starts becoming normal because I think about it so much, if that makes any sense. Like for example, if I were to think of blowing a guy on a day when I felt confident and straight, I would be disgusted and have no arousal, but if I were to think of that on a day when I feel like I dont know who I am anymore and constantly stressing about it, then it could give me arousal or make me think that it isnt so weird.

Does the average straight guy look at a naked woman sometimes and doesnt get aroused or turned on? Or would they get an instant erection from one? Cause once I see a woman and if I dont think I have the reaction I should, thats when it all starts.

I hope that makes sense