Does it hurt to break up with opposite sex partners?

I am in the process of having identified as bisexual since I was about, oh, maybe 13/14 or so, and now am 31, married to a man with kids, and realizing I am all the way gay, not bisexual. I can't tell you if you are bisexual or lesbian, but I can tell you that it is hurting me right now the idea of losing the strong bond that I have with my husband, which is neither sexual, nor romantic, but has gotten us through many years of many horrible situations. I have been going through strong bouts of anxiety, and feeling exhilarated to really know who I am, and back to anxiety again... I personally think if you are indeed a lesbian, you might go through a process of grieving for the idea of the 'straight' person you thought you were. That's some of the advice I got here.

So I think what I am saying is yes, breaking up with anybody you've been with even if you're not of the same romantic/sexual orientation still hurts, and if you're finally coming to terms with your sexual identity, you can experience a sense of loss too.

I hope you continue to explore the ideas, so you can figure out who you are, and find support both here and with loved ones. Best wishes ~

 

Whether you're lesbian/bisexual you are still a person, and we all experience feelings of loss in relationships, you know? I mean, I had an abusive partner that was sooooooo bad in the past and I finally got away, and still, I felt loss. I think that's part of the human experience. BUT hey I'm still questioning technically so you never know, mileage may very wish you the best

 

if there is an emotional connection, it doesn't matter if it was the right or wrong gender, it hurts. there is that sense of loss, and all kinds of questioning. but the loss of a relationship is painful even when we know that it was the right thing to happen. I hope that your broken heart gets healed quickly.

 

Yes, it hurts. It hurted for me because I felt guilty. I loved my ex-bf in a 'friendly' way, and I confused it with romantic feelings. I saw him crying so many times because we couldn't be together, he thought there was something wrong with him, my heart broke. I even thought about staying in a relationship just for him, but I couldn't. He has a right to meet someone, he deserves someone who loves him fully, and wants him in every possible way.

I don't know if it's a good idea, but I regret it myself, so I will say it. I advice you to help him cope with it, like a friend. I had two bad break-ups with guys, and the first one ended up pretty badly. He started drinking, smoking, it took really long time to recover, and he became a totally new person. Just, be there for him... any way you can, if you are able to do that.

Good luck for you.

 

Yep, it hurts.There's a huge freedom in splitting up but there's also a period of loss you go through. The loss of the partner, whatever the attraction to that person was, you have a bond. The loss of the straight life associated with them can also be difficult. And the worst part I found, the guilt. I tried to hang around, make it work and then lastly tried to be friends. It was done with the best of intentions but I realise now it was mostly a bargaining process which I wish I hadn't put us through and it was heartbreaking. Have a good cry if that helps, then go out and enjoy the freedom