I'm currently 20 years old I'm so lost. I have no clue who i like anymore. I have no sexual experience. I'm a big porn guy since the age of 15. I watch everything but gay porn has been getting the job done a little more quicker. I honestly don't know if I like guys or girls or both for that matter. I had fantasies about guys in the past but it has been diminishing since I've gotten older. I made out with three girls in my short life. They were all satisfying. I've had many crushes on girls as well as fantasizing about them I never really had the desire to go out and get sex from a girl. I don't have the desire to go out and have sex with guys either, but im always curious about it. I also thought about going on dates with guys but the thoughts always become just a "friendly hangin with the guys kinda vibe" Thoughts about gay porn get me aroused, i've been having a bunch of gay dreams lately ( all of the voyeourism). I see guys at my school all the time and I look at them with an anxious stare. Im not sure what my feelings are. I feel like I might be ready to explore to settle this once and for all but idk. Don't know where to start. I don't fell like I have any libido. at all. I recently went to look at a gay video chat because I was so depressed about it. I just wanted to be true to myself. I got aroused a little but I wasn't feeling a connection. Does anyone have any thoughts about this.
My best guess it that you are bisexual. The important thing to remember is ONE DAY your true sexuality will reveal itself to you. Just know that you DON'T have to get ALL answers today. Try your best to not obsess over your true sexuality. Try to compare what you are through now as you are on JOURNEY of self exploration. The road of this journey is traveled one day at a time. (*hug*)
Bisexual, hm I thought about it. I don't really know what degree of it I'm in which confuses the hell outta me. Like If I am bisexual, it's not by much lol How will it reveal itself. Like i will be in a situation when I just know?
First, Welcome to EC! Secondly, there are absolutely people who are undoubtedly 100% homosexual, heterosexual, etc. There are definitely people who are completely equal across the board in terms of bisexuality or pansexuality; however, it is important to remember that their are many people who aren't. There are many people who have specific discrepancies or imbalances in regards to their attractions. There are people who feel as though they attractions shit and develop throughout time. Language is meant to convey meaning. Being able to put labels on things is a very helpful part of finding understanding, but we should never feel as though everything must be perfectly represented by a label. Especially when we are referring to our nature and identities. From the description you have given, there seems to be little question that you are bisexual to some varying degree. More times than not, it is not that it takes us ages to find the right label for ourselves rather it can take us an eternity to form enough of an understanding of a label that we begin to identify with it. Bisexuality is the state of being attracted to both sexes. It doesn't matter whether the degree breakdown is 20/80. It is still bisexuality. I would take some time to make peace with that realization. Ultimately, that label says little more about you individual than your sex or ethnicity. If you search for a label that will describe all of the complexity and individuality that exists within you and your view of your own identity, than you will never find what you are looking for.
