Hi I've always found the idea of a relationship with another male appealing, and I have never been in denial of my attraction to my own gender. When I watch porn it's almost exclusively between two men, and I always have a gay crush on between 1 and 3 people. Since age 11 I've considered myself bisexual. I would like to eventually have a family and raise my own children, but I like boys, so it's comfortable to pretend that I can get married and do so without ever having to tell anyone that I am bisexual unless I decide that I want to. Also, at age 11 I may have had a crush on a girl, but I might have only convinced myself of such. At age 12 I liked two girls, but one in particular, and I really did and still believe that I was attracted to her. Now I'm 15 and she's been my girlfriend for some 10 months, and I haven't had a crush on or felt any attraction towards any other girl. I know that I love her, but I don't think that I'm attracted to her. I never enjoyed kissing her, but maybe I just don't enjoy kissing? Though irrelevant, she is in a very similar situation as I am (apparently. we haven't really gone into detail about it). Sometimes I feel attracted to her but as far as I know it could just be my hormones. I haven't told anyone anything, except for my girlfriend whom I told that I am bisexual, when she asked. What's bothering me is that I'm not sure whether I should be in a relationship with her if it's not what I'm looking for, and that I'm not sure whether I can keep considering myself bisexual since I haven't felt attraction to any other girl since age 12 (though I have felt attraction to many other boys since then).
I'm offended by the turn androphile, becuase the suffix file is usually used in words to describe a mentally seen to be mentally challenged or ill like a NECROPHILE! or ZOOPHILE!.So don't call anyone a androphile or homophile pls! I digress. I tried convincing myself i was bi. but i realized that the feelings I had for girls were not existent no matter how hard i tried to be romantically or sexually attracted to girls, Especially compared to the feelings i had for boys and I'm more or less gay whether i want to be or not, it's the way I am.
Ok... basically clicked this to see what androphile was. Never heard the term... yes phile makes one think that it is a term to describe a mental illness.... And what is androsexual? I've never heard that term either. You describe yourself as bisexual in your post though. You are wondering if you are indeed bisexual or not? Two things; ten months is a long time in a relationship (well not long, long....) But it is long enough to get relaxed and comfortable in your relationship. You may not realize the attraction and spark that was there initially in your relationship. Try to think back, were you attracted to your girlfriend in the begining of your relationship? Next thing, you are still pretty young. You definately have time to figure this out! You should get the opportunity throughout your lifetime to date both guys and girls...hopefully the opportunity arises eventually for you. No, you don't have to ever tell anyone you are bi. But it may be helpful for you. But again, totally your choice. Also, it may be helpful for you to be able to get in touch with your feelings. If you have been dating your girlfriend this long, do you trust her? It might be a good thing to discuss your attractions with her. But maybe not bring up that you are unsure if you are attracted to her; that might hurt her feelings. But just maybe talk to her about your past feelings for guys and girls and tell her you are kinda unsure of your sexuality at the moment.... Hopefully she will be supportive. And I hope you figure this out. Like I said, you are young; and it's never too late to figure out your sexuality. Just do you and be happy!
