I've been starting to have emotional attractions to girls, but sexually attracted to guys. I think I'm turning straight but I want to be gay. What should I do?
I think that might be considered bisexual. I think there isn't a lot you can do. Forcing yourself not to be straight is like forcing yourself not to be gay; it doesn't really work. Although if you're attracted to both males and females, whichever way you might be attracted, be it emotionally or physically, then you might just be Bisexual. Good luck to you
Yeah, depending on how you see it "Gay (a bit straight)" can be seen as bisexual. But also, how can you tell that you are experiencing emotional attraction to girls? You may definitely be but how does it differ from friendship in your case? And why do you want to be gay?
This is exactly why I have an issue with labels. When you experience something that is contradictory to the label you use to identify with then you have an Identity crisis. I think the best thing to do is accept what is happening as natural and just let it be. You can still identify as gay if you want to - you do not have to act on these feelings if you don't want to it's all gravy. You're perfectly normal
Are you saying that it's not wrong to identify with a label that doesn't fit you as long as you feel comfortable? I'm by no means trying to start an argument and I'm not angry or anything, I'm just curious to know why you see things that way. In my opinion, it's not about what you feel comfortable with identifying yourself as because then I would probably say that I'm completely straight (which I might as well be, I haven't quite figured it out yet) even if I know that I probably have some attraction to women. I think it's best to be honest with yourself and not go with what makes you feel comfortable but with what is actually the truth. And I also know that there is a difference between what feels comfortable and what feels right (true).
EDIT: Clarity I didn't mean to offend anyone at all, so apologies in advance. I also haven't entirely figured it out yet either. I'm not saying to use a label you actually do not fit but are using it because it's easier or anything like that - or using a label that just isn't the truth-I think there should be comfort in the truth. By all means label yourself how you want, if you believe you belong to that label - just don't get attached to the label. I feel like having a sexual orientation identity may be helpful for some but it can also be a hinderance. If you have felt all your life that you were a gay man say, and you knew for a long time, so you decided to Identify as Gay. And in a sense you may rigidly live your life by your definition of what Gay means for you, become that definition. But if something happens that shakes your identity well you become ungrounded in a sense because you were so attached to an identity and then it turned out life happened and you found that identity no longer works and you have an identity crisis. Sometimes I think having a label can help you, but just getting hung up on them is where the problem lies. I am sorry if I came across as ignorant and insensitive, repetitive or anything but I personally don't like labels for anything as identities. Labels are for Jars - not people Beside, I was given a label, my name and that's what I'm going use to identify as
I'm not sure about other people, but you didn't offend me I've just seen so many people saying that you should go with the label you feel most comfortable with and I just wanted some clarity on what exactly they, or in this case you, meant. I also completely agree that it's never good to identify with a label to the point where you "become" it. I like labels for sexual orientations for clarification but I don't want to feel like they restrain me.
Deep within feel that I am truly gay, but i am starting get straight feelings. It feels like I am becoming not me. Its really scary, not acting yourself. It feels that my identity is gay, not straight, I just don't want to have sex with a girl. I want to do it with a guy, but my heart beats for girls while my dick erects at guys.
Does it feel like you're truly gay because you want to be gay or because that is something you have identified with for a long time so it's difficult to be open to other things? Or do you truly feel like you are gay? But if that were the case it wouldn't make sense that you have romantic attraction for women.. How many women have made this happen to you and in what instances? Are you emotionally attracted to guys also?
I've been gay since I was 7. It just feels, not me to have that emotional attraction to girls. But I see what you mean. Thanks.
