I have been questioning for a few weeks now and now i feel like im more confused than before. The only attractions i have ever had for men are in porn, I watched certain gay themed porn for a long time and i never thought about it. When i question I wonder if all that time it made me believe i was gay. I never thought about girls sexually because it was "dirty and wrong". So i didnt do it. Now i tried experimenting with straight porn and the girls dont turn me off, but i dont get an erection. But if see a guy getting pleasure it turns me on, i feel like because i can relate to it. I dont really want to have sex with a guy, and i never had an urge to in real life, but neither girls in real life . In porn some girls are very attractive and i get the thought wow i wonder what it is like to have sex with her, but i dont get hard. (maybe because i have no real life experience?). I was always more interested in girls romantically and emotionally than guys. But this confuses me because i get hard faster by seeing the guy. Usually when im in a more vunerable place emotionally, i just think wow i must be gay. But when im feeling confident about myself i feel more straight. I have very low self esteem and self worth and when im out in public i always compare myself to other guys. I am at a road block right now and its very scary and if i am gay i just want complete peace so i can move on and deal with it. But i dont know for sure, i could be bi, or a confused heterosexual. Im just so dang tired of it all and i dont really have a support system around me. Does anyone else have this problem at the moment or if you have any advice please share
You might have a look at this: Am I Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, or Transgender? There is sexual and romantic attraction... and some people need an emotional connection first... Your thinking you might be gay might be a sign in itself... usually straight people do not question if they are straight, except for a bit of curiousity... You might look for support, from a counselor. And you might have a look at the next lgbt center near you, there might be support groups... or join a gsa... and you should not compare yourself... people are unique... you could do a few things to raise your self confidence... there are tutorials on that on the web... you might pick one from a trustworthy source, one which makes sense... I'd say take your time... hugs