A sidenote: my grammer and structuring is gonna be shit as im shaking really hard, Thanks in advance Hey! so i want to start out saying im 14. Ive always rejected the idea of being gay from a young age because my brothers would always go on about how "1 of 3 one of us was likely to be gay" so ive always just not wanted to be different to my brothers and would tell myself that being gay was not something i wanted to be, so i pushed all thoughts of "male attraction" out of my mind although cant remember myself ever having genuine crushes on girls. Ive started feeling sexual and romantic feelings towards guys, like in the changing room id check out the guys with their shirts off, and even started watching gay youtubers becuse i can relate to them and think they're hot. I guess ive always found men attractive unconsiously as whenever i watched straight porn the most erotic part for me was when the guy undid his fly but always just ignored this. I have been turned on by women in porn though, when they get theyre breasts out and stuff and then think about it and get hard the next day although sometimes the guy would come into the image too somewhere although i dont know if im picturing a woman because thats what everyone else does, is that normal for unsure gay guys to do?. However in real life i can literally only keep girlfriends for 2 days as it just feels wrong somehow. Ill always fantasize about kissing guys and touching their chest, it being really arousing but then my mind telling me to snap out of it. As for girls when i picture kissing them i dont feel anything, but do it anyway (i sound insane right now, i promise im not). If i looked on about 30 years from now and saw myself married to a guy who gets me and is romantic and funny i start to feel so amazing, again my brain pushes this out. If i picture myself married to a girl and have kids i guess i can see myself being happy of living a normal life, but very slightly out of place. Ive told a really close friend that i think im attracted to guys but dont plan on telling anyone else until im sure of it. By the way i cant stop thinking about all this. Here are some sterotypical gay things about me: I hate contact sports Im quite body concious and tidy I love design and colored clothing thanks for hearing me out, please leave more questions below, id be really happy to know what you'd think
Hey, don't worry about the stereotypes. That doesn't have anything to do with your sexual orientation -- it's just apart of your personality, which is totally alright. Gay guys can definitely be turned on by women in straight porn because... well, it's porn, and a lot of gay guys do watch straight porn (and straight guys watch gay porn, too). It's what you really want in real life that matters. Think about YOU having sex with a woman, or YOU being with a woman, not another guy with a woman. Sexual orientation is about you after all. If you feel like being with a woman is not appealing and it would not make you happy, then that's a sign that you may be gay, not bisexual. But, ultimately, it is up to you to decide. In any case, don't beat yourself up for it. It will be okay, and it does not make you insane for feeling this way.
