I shall admit I have very little understanding of Pansexuality other than that fact that this sexual orientation involves a person being attracted to a significant other regardless of their gender, it's all about their personality. So that being said, I was chatting with someone earlier today and I was telling him about my demisexuality and how I'm largely inclined towards romance and emotion rather than sex and he said that I would be great with a pansexual guy because Pansexuals really do not differentiate between gender so my cravings for romance and an emotional connection would mesh well with a Pan guy. Prior to that conversation, dating a Pansexual man never even crossed my mind for reasons largely unknown but now however, I'm quite curious as to what the prospect of dating a Pan man would be like! Is sex important and if so how does sexual attraction work for Pansexuals, like what would a pansexual man deem to be his "type" in another man? I can somewhat grasp Bisexuality and how there's a distinction made between Men and Women and how bisexuals definitely can appreciate different aspects of both genders but how does that play into for Pansexuals? Are gay sexual roles like "Top" and "Bottom" part of same sex pansexual relationships? Do Pansexuals have more of an inclination towards a certain gender or again is it more about personality? Pansexual men, are looks important to you in determining whether or not you're attracted to another guy? Are there Pansexual men who are part of the gay community/scene and share similar interests as other gay men ? I am sure I sound like an utter ninny for asking all this but I genuinely am curious so please bear with me!
Wow, so many questions! I am a female but I feel like I can answer most of these questions, although you may want some input from some males here as well. So I sort of agree and disagree with your/your friends definition of pansexuality. Yes, pansexuals are attracted to a significant other regardless of their gender, and yes personality plays a large roll as it should in most relationships. HOWEVER, I disagree with the idea that pansexuals are any less 'sexual' then another person, its just that we dont care what is down out partners pants because we like it all. Yes some may be more or less sexual then others but that isnt defined by the sexual orientation of Pansexual. As I said above, sex importance depends on the person. Now I am sort of ace so my attraction may vary but physically I find im sexually attracted to hips my hands fit perfectly on, backs that are nicely defined, sometimes boobs, sexy abs and those 'V's. Everyone has their own type. Same concept only add in the trans community. We can appreciate the non-binary, third gender, gender fluid bodies/personalities, etc. I dont fully get the question, you're asking if a pansexual is in a same sex relationship do they have the generic 'top' and 'bottom' rolls that gay couples use durring sex? I would say yes if im understanding the question correctly. This again depends on the person, like a bisexual can be more inclined to one gender then the other, its not the sexual orientation but the person themselves. So it is possible but not guaranteed. Not a guy, but I believe there's usually at least some physical attraction in any relationship. Id say of course, they like men, so they share the interest. And for a pansexual male who is more incline to like males he may be more in that scene then another pan male but both could be in that community/scene. Hopefully I could answer some of your questions, I think most of your questions are more about the person then the orientation however. Pansexuals can appreciate any gender, but they have their own preferences about each gender. -Fate PS: From the sounds of it you want to know if your good dating a pansexual. The best I can tell you is to test the waters, be open about your sexuality/demi-ness. Have you ever dated a bi-guy? Thats the best I could compare it to.
YAY! Thank you for taking the time to answer my question, I appreciate it! I definitely learned something! In terms of dating a bisexual man, no I haven't but when the friend did mention how to Pansexuals that gender was not a big perquisite, I thought it'd be different in that me being a male wouldn't phase the person or at least in my mind it wouldn't make me second guess myself. I know this is quite silly since I KNOW that all bisexual men are not the same but I just have a weird feeling that if I were with a bisexual man I'd feel like I wouldn't stack up to other women he'd possibly be attracted to, yes even though I know we'd be in a relationship lol In terms of pansexuality, I do find the idea of pushing past the gender and simply loving the person for who they are quite endearing!
For me, I like people who are genuine, kind, caring, open, and a little goofy. Nice eyes and a good smile attract me most of all. The particular parts below are extra bonuses. Things vary so much by individual though that you can't second guess what's going to float someones boat. And isn't everyone a little self-conscious when first in a relationship about "stacking up" to the competition. For a pan/bi-sexual you have the whole population to worry about, not just women. So, I wouldn't worry about anything like that specifically, if a guy is with you, he wants to be with you.
Oh definitely, so many people are afraid of the competition and afraid of losing their partner because of low self esteem or confidence or what ever the reason. If you are with someone it's because you both care about each other and you need to stop worrying so much about losing them or being good enough and just be yourself and love yourself. -Fate
oh that's interesting and quite endearing response I'm all about emotion and romance so I ideally would want someone who's into that too and physically I don't care as long as I click with him ---------- Post added 9th Feb 2015 at 09:47 PM ---------- Agreed! I feel quite silly saying what I said. I think as long as two people are into each other emotionally there shouldn't be any worry or cause for concern. Love is all that matters at the end of the day eh?
Hi, I'm a guy who feels pansexual is probably the closest description of my nature. What I found is that it's how someone moves, acts, talks, their pheromones etc that turns me on. Not whether they have a vagina or a penis. Not whether they look like a model (that's more like icing on the cake...nice but not essential). Sex is critically important for me. Without that, you are just room mates/friends. My type in men is usually somewhat androgynous, pretty looking guys. Most hetero guys can guess the ones I like are gay/bi. I'm struggling to think of a famous example...if you crossed the mannerisms and sexuality of Marc Almond with the looks of (young) Michael Monroe (Hanoi Rocks) or Nero Bellum (Psyclon Nine) that's about the closest I can think of. The other 'type' is boyishly handsome e.g. James Dean (who actually was bi, drool), young Brad Pitt. Of course in the real world circles we live in, people tend to be a bit less cute I tend to have more dom/top urges with men and more passive/sub with women or trans women. But the more strong feelings I have for someone, the less that matters, I don't really think of it in those terms. At the moment I'm not 100% clear which my gender preference is. The characteristics one person has tend to outweigh massively any 'overall' gender preference. If you are open to all genders, then a super sexy & fascinating individual will be far more appealing than the 'average' of the other gender and vice versa. Basically it's all about the individual and how they match with you. Looks to me are maybe 1/3-1/2 of overall appeal. But at least half of 'looks' is physical condition and lifestyle, and grooming. Put a guy with a plain face in a nice suit (or biker leathers, ha!), get him going to the gym 5 times a week, quitting smoking/boozing, sharp hairstyle, inject some personality and flirting skills, and he will become a lot more attractive. Same with a woman - a hot toned body makes up for an average or somewhat plain face, and body condition is 100% under your control. Also, all this is overriden if you get in love with someone...then looks don't matter much at all IMO.
