Over the course of several months, i've struggled with being confused about who I am. Only recently have I came to closer terms about that by reading and studying sexuality. It was hinted that porn escalation is a considerable cause to many straight guy's sudden change in sexual tastes and etc, in which I can account for: I started out with softcore porn (age 8), gradually got into hardcore porn (age 10), then it was transsexual porn (age 17) and finally gay porn (age 18, now). For many others, it's a different process, some get into more extreme genres, illegal even. I realized that once I found myself aroused by men, I panicked becase of the rigid ideas of sexuality imposed on society by misguided educators and religion, which I too was brought up on by media, parenting and so forth, plauged my mind. Yet I also panicked because for my whole life I only knew myself to be interested in women, and all of a sudden my interests seemed to shift in ways I did not anticipate. But since then, i've been learning all there is to know about sexuality in humans as well as animals and sexual behavior in such species throughout history and how our outlooks on sexuality have been changed. Certain days i'm exculsively interested in women, other days I may check out nude male models and videos to gain some arousal, but at the end of the day I prefer women. That's what I want to touch on, I know who I want to date, I know who I want to have sex with, women, but mental wise on average, I have a stronger response to the thoughts and view of say, a ripped nude male with an erection versus an atractive nude female. Visually it seems, men do it for me, but physically, women do it for me, though I have not had sex within over a year, I have no idea how responsive I am to actual sex with a female since my last encounter. Currently I like this girl at school a lot, if we end up dating, eventually sex will come into play. I'm insecure as it is and I don't know how I'll respond sexually. Most of my life, all i've known was masturbation up until a specific ex of mines, but even after her, my means of sexual gratification were only through masturbation and porn. I just don't feel i'll be able to have sex with a girl because of that and the changes i've experienced over the course of my porn viewing. What should I do? Thank you in advance.
You might try to quit porn for some time. The dimension of love and relationship is missing there. You could concentrate on that a bit... you could take your time... and see where t takes you. hugs
I think you've made a thread like this before. Regardless, stop watching porn. Porn in itself is taboo, and contains too many reasons as to why people watch it. It could align with your orientation, or it might not. What you think is arousing in porn (from personal experience) is not what you would expect in reality, at all. I've been a porn addict for 7 years. I know what it's like. My advice: Socialize/interact with others more. That would give you a much more accurate indicator of who you are. I get aroused/a rush of excitement when a girl puts her hand on my arm. And when I held hands with a girl, I got a boner. In addition, I made out with a girl and it gave me a massive boner. Continuing the usage of porn programs your mind to have a preconditioned response when there's an individual that looks like the ones in porn. That's when you know that you are trying to mix reality and fantasy which never aligns with each other. In fantasy, YOU are in complete control, whereas in reality, you are not. Stop the use of porn, because it will only get worse. I'm not going to sugar coat this at all, but look up the aftereffects of porn, it's pretty bad.
