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My "girlfriend" is a boy

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by Beth01, Feb 27, 2015.

  1. Beth01

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    I started dating this girl in early December. We were madly in love and our relationship has been fantastic. She was always so supportive and great, but she would always ask weird things like "would you still like me if I were a boy?". I've always considered myself very much a lesbian, I never find boys attractive and I've only ever had crushes on girls. But slowly my girlfriend has started to... change. Very subtly, she would wear less feminine clothing, cologne, and mentioned getting a boys haircut. One day she... or they, I guess, texted me and explained that they weren't sure of their gender anymore. They've said that they think they might be a boy and want to go by a boys' name now. I love them so much, but now that they're questioning their gender I don't know what do do, or what my sexual orientation is anymore- please help, I really need advice on how to cope with this.
     
  2. absolutely

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    Love them as best you can
     
  3. shota

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    I happen to be transgender male my self all I could tell you is if you want this take it if you don't please talk it out ok?
     
  4. BradThePug

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    I would communicate your concerns to them. I know that's not easy to do, but it is important for them to know your feelings. You could have a conversation about what would be best for both of you this way.
     
  5. Lipstick Leuger

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    You are STILL a Lesbian. Sexual orientation is what YOU say it is. I know lesbians/Queer Femmes that are or have been married to males, me for instance. I was married to a MTF that was unable to have the surgery and I accepted that. He was physically male but inside a woman. It did not affect my sexuality at all. Still a Queer Femme. You will be a lesbian if you are with a man or a woman or if you are alone.

    It's a different situation you face, but ask yourself, do you LOVE this person? What if they became Obese, lost their legs or were now in a wheelchair? What if they were suddenly disfigured? If you still would love them, then you can love them through this journey.
     
  6. Wildside

    Wildside Guest

    this doesn't change the fact that you're a lesbian. but it does mean that they aren't what you thought they were. and if you are not into boys, well...
     
  7. confuzzled82

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    As far as the relationshio, it's up to you. One of my friends identifies as a lesbian, but she loves her husband. I say, screw the label. If you want to continue your relationship with him, go for it. Gender and sexuality aren't as black and white as many think it is.