So I've been thinking that I could possibly be a lesbian instead of straight. Here is my story. So it all started when I was 14 years old. I started thinking that I liked girls. I was really confused and stressed about it. I started thinking about this girl that I met at my out patient program(long story why i ended up there). I started having fantasys about her and wanting to be with her. Those feelings went away eventually. After that, I identified myself as straight. I been identifying myself as straight for a long time. Then those feelings came back. I developed a crush on my friend that's a girl. I really liked her. I told her that I liked her and she took it really well which was a huge relieve for me. She told me that she was straight and that she didn't like me back. That made me upset. Then I wanted to kiss her REALLY REALLY BAD. I didn't because I froze up and got scared. My crush that I had on her went away. I still don't know if I'm gay or not. I've dated guys in the past but it wasn't like a serious relationship. I didn't have any feelings for my past boyfriends. But with my friend I did. She's the only girl that I had a crush on. But I still don't know and I REALLY want to know. I also started having fantasy's about girls and having sex with them and kissing them and stuff. I still have fantasy's about boys as well.
Well, from what I can read. I'd say that you're not straight xD If I understand well, you feel attracted to girls and to boys, then I guess that it makes you bi ^^ I can't say precisely if you're more into girls or boys but you just seem to be into both. Well, if I had one thing to tell you personally it would be not to freak out or to over react (I don't know you, but it seems to be quite common). No matter who you are, you're still you. So love yourself for who you are.
No one can tell you what you are and especially not based what you wrote since you didn't talk much about your feelings for guys. But I second Aeolia and I'd say that you're not straight if you have a real crush on someone of the same sex. I would suggest investigating your feelings for guys more and figure out if you are attracted to them or not because the same sex attraction seems to already be there. And sexuality isn't always black and white so you may want to consider being bisexual as well and not just a lesbian. How does it feel to fantasize about girls vs. guys?
When I fantasize about girls it feels natural. Like I feel happy when I fantasize about girls. When I fantasize about boys it feels okay. Like it feels normal. Same with girls. Like it feels right.
Just to clarify, when I said "real crush" I didn't mean "girl crushes" which straight girls can have or even "man crushes" for straight guys. I actually don't know what a crush feels like since I've never had one myself but I think it's basically when you're sexually and/or romantically attracted to a person and want to be more than just friends. At least that's my impression of what a "real crush" is/feels like. Okay, even if I asked that I do not always think that what you simply fantasize about is the best way to know what your sexuality is. If you're in denial for example (not saying you are) you can still fantasize about the opposite sex and like it because you think that's what you should do opposed to fantasizing about the same sex. Do you know if you're sexually and romantically attracted to guys? It's difficult to help you if you don't provide more information on how you feel about them.
Well when I watch straight porn I get turned on down below. I don't know if that counts but thats how i get down there when i watch it. But I never was sexually or romanticly attracted to a guy in real life.
Well I watched straight porn and that got me hard as well. Porn is a bit iffy when it comes to orientation. I would be more concerned about how it feels in real life and see if it feels right to you.
I agree with Jax12, porn isn't the best way to decide your sexuality. If you're not sexually or romantically attracted to men but to women then you are a lesbian.
