Hello people. It's my first thread here and I need some advise. I'm a 21 guy and in most part of my life I only had straight crushes (I only dated a gay guy once). Well, with time (and pain), I got over every one of them but now I got caught. I'm crushing hard on a co-worker, straight guy. He started here in a couple of weeks and after some days I just woke up and realized he is the guy. He is so handsome, a little shy, quiet and everything. If you ask me, I could have have said he has some signs he could like guys too, but so I've found him on Facebook to look for something we could have in common and BANG! He has a girlfriend. From that on I'm very depressed because I'm stuck again with this straight crush thing and I know where it ends :bang: . It's even worse because we work together. I work at the office so I have access to the cameras of the place and I can't help but catch myself staring at him all day (I know it sounds creepy). It makes me so happy being around him and helping him with the job. But all of a sudden a branch hits me in the head and a voice says -"He's straight. He has a girlfriend. You can't be with him. Ever". I don't know what to do. My heart says I have a chance (besides everything) but my head says I don't. I know I should just let him be, but I just can't. Can you tell me what to do? Any advise is welcome.
Uh, just cause he has a girlfriend, doesn't mean he's straight. I was married for 21 years, and I'm anything but straight. Granted I was closeted (bisexual) since the age of 13, but if the opportunity had ever come up, I probably would have been okay with going out with guys. This is not meant to give you hope, but you shouldn't necessarily give up either. Does he know you are gay? Do you guys have anything in common? Can you approach him and ask him to do something together? Even something as simple as going out for coffee on a break, or drinks after work. Maybe throw in "God I wish you were gay, you are such a super guy." or something like that? I think the biggest thing that helps me with crushes, is trying to see them in a more realistic light. Once you start noticing that they aren't perfect, you start getting more realistic expectations.
