So I use to identify as asexual because I realize I wasn't sexually attracted to men, but recently I've been questioning whether or not I'm attracted to women. I'm still kind of confused about sexual attraction though and what exactly it is. So I was wondering, what was it like when you first started experiencing sexually attracted to women? How did you feel? What did you think? How old were you? Etc. I'm just trying to figure myself out, so if you could offer some insight, I would greatly appreciate it. Thanks.
For me, sexual attraction is basically a huge physical rush 'down there'. The rest of my body heats up and gets excited thinking of that person. I fantasize about them sexually, etc. With that being said, I've only been sexually attracted to one person in my entire life, and it was toward a friend I wish I could be with. For some people it just takes longer and requires the right person.
I felt as if something about the person just attracted me to her and made me want to kiss her, touch her. I would get turned on by her presence. I'd have fantasies involving that person. This is how sexual attraction works for me.
I discovered I wasn't interested in guys before I realised I liked girls, so I too though I just couldn't feel sexual/romantic attraction (asexuality). But a girl came that made tingle from contact, shiver with her closeness, and heat up... Ummm... Down there. Haha That and the occasional distraction from real life were you daydream and have fantasies about her (day and night) or simply wanting to impress, give gifts or engage in as many activities as posible and voilà!! Sexual attraction!
I was similar to you, I've had emotional attractions to guys but they never "turned me on" and I thought maybe I was somewhere on the asexual spectrum. When I started letting my feelings in for women I felt like someone had lifted a dark veil, one I'd been looking through all my life and never knew was there. I was floored by the intensity of feeling and I finally understood so many things about other people, and relationships, that had eluded me most of my life. My feelings of attraction are basically as Fallingdown described, a heat and warmth that sort of spreads through your body, often for me it's accompanied by some small joy or excitement in my chest at just seeing the person. Also enjoying the person's touch, her smell, just being in her presence.
My first feelings for another female came in my early teens. It was that warm flushed feeling from head to toe and a skipping heart and was definitely both romantic and sexual attraction. And as with TheStormInside even a small touch, her scent, or even just being near is a powerful thing.
