I've finally come to terms I like girls both romantically and sexually without shame after 4-5 years of struggling with it, and I feel definitely more at peace. But also at the same time, I had a major crush on a boy in elementary school and in 9th grade, and for the one in 9th grade, I really only liked him because he was the only boy to even glance at me or talk to me, so i'm not sure if I really even liked him, or the attention he gave me. Also I've been thinking, I don't think I'd ever want to have sex with a man either, it just doesn't appeal to me, but romantically, I'm not sure? Any crushes I've had on boys over the years seem to be because they were the only boy to give me attention, not because of their personality or that they turned me on or got me sexually excited or anything, but still, I'm still kind of unsure? Am i a lesbian despite having had a elementary crush on a boy and liking a boy in 9th grade? Or am I just bisexual and heavily leaning towards girls? Thank you so much, sorry it was so lengthy.
You are what you think you are! If you think you're bi, then you're bi. If you think you're a lesbian, you're a lesbian. You have to go with whichever label feels best to you. I identify as a lesbian despite my occasional attraction to men. I sometimes notice men, think they're good looking and would want to hook up with them but my feelings toward them never go beyond that and so I identify as a lesbian. There are some girls though who experience the same attraction towards men and identify as bi. It really is up to you. I hope this helped and good luck!
I'm similar to you, in that I've had pretty strong crushes on a couple of guys, but I have no interest in being with them sexually. For now I consider myself gay because I'm just not attracted to men the way I am to women, and don't really want to date guys. It's the sort of thing I keep an open mind about so "if it happens, it happens," but it's not something I'm looking for the way I would like to start dating women. Like Emily1 said, it's up to you to determine what label fits you best and that you feel comfortable with.
