I've been told by a few people that I can't possibly know I'm bi since I've never had sex (with anyone of either sex). One of the people who told me this is bi herself, and said I'm only bi-curious, not bisexual. Seriously, someone in the LGBT+ community! No one is immune to prejudice, I guess. This makes me mad because I know how I feel, and I know that I'd be perfectly fine sleeping with a man or a woman. Just because I've never done it doesn't mean I'm solely "curious" about it. Has anyone ever told you that your sexuality is invalid because you've never tried it? How do you convince people otherwise?
I think this happens to all LGBT related people. I get this too as a lesbian (I also have never had sex with either gender). Likewise, even when It's done, we still get invalidated. I know lesbians who have slept with women and they are still told "they can't know because they've never given men a chance". But if they sleep with men they are told "You can't be a lesbian because you have male experience". I'm not sure how this works for bisexuals, but I assume the discrimination is similar. It disgusts me when people in our own community are so closeminded.
I understand what you mean. I am 24, I've never had sex with a man, neither with a woman. I was never interested in men and it took me a while to see there is another option - being with a woman. When I came out to a friend that I really like women and I am possibly lesbian, she didn't really believe, she was still asking how could I know that if I never was with a man and suggedted me to try to be with men first...I guess some people just don't get it that you have that feeling inside yourself, that feeling when something just clicks, feels right, even if you didn't have sexual experience before.
My brother means well, but he seems to believe the same thing. He has this ideology that what makes a person gay or straight is the ratio of people of two sexes they've had intercourse with-- that is to say if a man has slept with four women and three men, that man is straight because he's had sex with more women than men. He doesn't have any qualms with homosexuality, but his understanding of it seems a bit... flawed.
The response that many people give when asked "how do you know if you've never slept with___" Is, "how do you know for sure that you're straight if you haven't slept with __? You just know. You don't have to have sex to know."
I had an idea that I would like sex with a guy, but of course in my mind, I wouldn't really know until I actually tried it (that was my mentality). At the moment I'm more interested in guys, ever since I started exploring my attractions to guys that is. So I kinda knew but not really, if that makes any sense. Not sure with girls at the moment.
EWW! How rude! :eusa_naug I'm sorry someone said that to you! I agree with "Queero" ^. Your experience level does not dictate your sexual orientation/sexual preference. It's such a shame that people feel comfortable telling others how to feel/who they are. But unfortunately we can't change those people. We can, however, lead by example. (*hug*) Just gotta keeping going, or you can be witty! and reply "Wow, I must just be super lucky"
