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Am I a lesbian?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by futuristicfire, Apr 8, 2015.

  1. futuristicfire

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    At one point, my mum was talking to her friend about the guy from The Bachelor and I just felt left out. Who would have known a cheesy reality TV show would've made me question my sexuality?
    To be honest, I was questioning quite a while before that, but that's what triggered me to actually come here and talk about it.
    I just can't appreciate men in the same way I do women, y'know?
    There are male characters from stuff I like, and I have plenty male friends, but I can't really see myself actually liking them beyond "That guy? Oh, that guy's cool."
    While feeling left out whilst the rest of the straight female world cries over Zayn leaving 1D I just... :eusa_doh:

    also it doesnt help i was surprisingly okay with this one yuri anime i watched
     
  2. sedgeling

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    I think that you should just take some time with your feelings. I get where you're coming from. Honestly, one of my best friends is a gay guy, and he was always trying to show me pictures of dudes or point them out and talk about them with me, but I wasn't ever all that interested most of the time. Same thing with straight friends. I mean sure, I can see that a guy is handsome from an aesthetic perspective, but I don't want to sleep with him or anything.

    I mean, there is no need to over-analyze every little thought that might say that you're straight or gay or bi or whatever. Just let your experiences come as they do, and just see where things go. A label can come later. As it stands, if you're into a girl, you're into a girl. If you find a dude you like, then you like that dude. There is nothing wrong with questioning, but I wouldn't fret too much over all of this. What is going to happen will happen, and you'll know when it does.
     
  3. blueberrykisses

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    I know that feeling. Before I realized I was gay (at 12) girls were always talking about boys and I was SO annoyed at them, I thought liking boys was pointless and stupid. I would get angry when girls started talking about boys. I just rolled my eyes and left. I had no idea I was gay. :grin:DD

    Now I just ignore and get on with myself or sit and be quiet... haha.
     
  4. mindthegap

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    I totally agree with sedgeling. Try to focus on your feelings, not what label is the one for you. I was overthinking so much, it took me a lot of time everyday when I was just thinking and trying to analyse everything. What helped (and still doess) me a lot is going out among people as much as I can. I just go out, walking around the town, watching people (however creepy this sounds) and I focus on my feelings. And I also started to write diary which helped me a lot, it kept all my thoughts in one place so I could go bac to them anytime.

    Reading this is like reading my own words. I feel the same. I am not blind, I can see and appreciate if a guy is handsome or he has a good physique, that he just takes care of himself, but that doesn't mean I would want him to be anywhere near me, I mean sexually. It's just observation, there's nothing more in it.
     
  5. DarrenB

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    I understand what you're saying. I'm kind of the same way (except it's flipped). I can very easily look at a picture of a girl and go "wow, she is really pretty," and then carry on with my day. Point in case, my desktop wallpaper is currently Ryuko from Kill la Kill. I think she's really cool, and awesome, and stuff, but it's not like I want to touch her. She's like a super hero to me.

    I remember listening to two of my straight male friends have a conversation about which characters in this game they played they wanted to sleep with (I'm putting it politely, they used different wording). The whole conversation was strange and awkward to me. I thought some of the characters were pretty, sure, but I definitely didn't want to sleep with them. I was so confused like, "huh? wha, why would I want to..."

    Here's a few things I thought about that helped me realize I was gay:
    1. Even though I think women are very pretty, I really have no desire to kiss or sleep with them. I just, don't want to touch them. Hugging as friends sure, but beyond that, I don't feel anything.
    2. Whenever I watch a movie or whatever that has girl who's going through a tough time, I think "oh that poor girl, I hope she finds someone to help her feel better." I'm sad, but there's this emotional disconnect I feel. But if it's a guy, I usually burst into tears from how sad it makes me.
    3. From what I've seen, straight people seem to be uncomfortable with gay romance. But for me, even before I suspected I might be gay, I thought lesbian/gay romance was infinitely more cute, beautiful and romantic than straight romance. I think if I was straight, I would be a bit more bothered by gay/lesbian romance. To be honest, most of the straight romance I've seen is pretty boring to me. :/

    To me, what you said sounds kind of like how I feel, which makes me inclined to think that yes, you are quite possibly lesbian.

    Side note, if you like yuri anime, you should watch YuruYuri, it's absolutely hilarious, and super adorable.
     
  6. sappho06

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    Straight girls talking about "hot" guys, it's annoying. I always feel left out when people start talking about crushes or good looking guys, but I've just never been interested in that. It sounds to me as though you already identify as a lesbian, no? Anyway, don't worry about labelling yourself too soon :slight_smile:
     
  7. mindthegap

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    I agree with this. I remember watching a video of lesbian wedding, it had all ceremony, vows...It was so cute, even made me cry, that I showed it to two my close friends, both straight girls. One (who doesn't know I'm gay) told me: "Why are you watching lesbian wedding? How did you get to this video anyway?" The second (who I am out to) told me: "I accept you like girls, but this is too much for me, I don't like that."
    And one more thing...the only time when I feel uncomfortable watching lesbian romance is when my dad is around me. I didn't tell him anything about me yet, so even the smallest thing that mentions/shows/talks about homosexuals makes me jumpy and TOTALLY uncomfortable and scared :lol: