I think that I'm probably bisexual but I'm having a hard time accepting it. Until very recently I was in a serious relationship with a guy for nearly four years, he was so wonderful but my doubts about my sexuality and our relationship in general ended up in me being unfaithful. I've always had feelings (both sexual and romantic) towards girls throughout these past four years but obviously I've never had a chance to explore them. However now I'm free to see other people I'm finding this whole 'coming out' process quite daunting and for years I've hid behind my relationship as an excuse to not be gay basically.To be honest I just need a little advice on how to approach exploring my sexuality because I feel a little unhinged, none of my friends (as I know of) are lesbian or bisexual and so I don't know who to talk to. My mind is going haywire at the moment, I'm constantly having fantasies about women, in particular women I've liked in the past and now I'm not even sure whether I'm either bi or a lesbian despite knowing being a lesbian can't be possible because I've been with a man for so long. Nevertheless at the same time I know that I've never actually found him that physically attractive it was just the emotional connection from knowing him for so long. As you can probably tell... I'm very confused! Any help would be much much much appreciated x
It doesn't sound impossible that you are a lesbian. There are many women on the forum who identify as lesbian but were at one time in straight relationships. Welcome to EC!
I get where you're coming from. I'd liked guys all my life and was very hesitant to accept being bisexual because I hadn't explored it and didn't know if my feelings were legitamate. But I'm sure than it you do indeed have feelings for both men and women, you're bisexual. And even if you only like women right now, sexuality is very fluid and changes a lot. Maybe you're a lesbian, maybe you aren't. Anyway, I find it very helpful, basically therapeutic to confide in my friends. I don't have any gay/bi/fluid etc friends either but still, just talking with a friend is very helpful. And I'm sure they'd accept you if they're real friends. Coming out is indeed very scary!! Good luck to you! And post on my wall if you want someone to talk to
I agree with bi2me, it can be that you are a lesbian, being in a relationship with man before doesn't exclude you. There are women who were even married and then realised they are lesbians. And you said you were using your relatioship more like cover. But now when you are single, give yourself some time to expore your feelings. I don't have any LGBT friends at all so as suchconfusion said I talked about that with two close friends and cousin who I trusted. And I also joined another forum where are lesbians from my country and I found some that live close to me. And if you are not sure of your feeings, maybe experimenting would help. It will be easier to accept yourself once you are sure who you are.
