I know this is the question that a lot of people can't answer because it varies for most and it's so hard to tell but I really need help. I think I'm falling for yet another girl(which makes me even less straight than I thought I was before :eusa_liar). The problem is I dont want to like this girl in less she's gay because I don't want to pursue her and have her be straight because that has happened to me my first time around and I'm still having trouble letting it go. Anyways, I recently met this girl at a sporting event with a friend. She was there, let's call her "Clara" with my friend who I was meeting. We were all talking and I don't know how we got on the topic about boys but I noticed that she never said or mentioned one boy she likes. She just sort of said they thought she was cute but she didn't say what she thought about them. Also, when I look at her I think we give each other "the look" and EVERYONE knows the look I'm talking about. It's sort of like a long deep stare you give each other before breaking eye contact. The last thing is she's really touchy. For the first time meeting me I was very uncomfortable with how comfortable she was with touching me but I also noticed that she does that with a lot of people. In conclusion, I'm really confused about this girl and I think I sense something more but I'm not sure and I'm not going to make a fool of myself so any help is good :help: I also want to know what you guys feel like are important things I should watch for and what's your opinion on the gaydar gun a lot of people use now a days. Is it pretty accurate?(&&&)
There's no harm in asking, right? You could always be all casual. "Hey, you never talk about boys. Why is that?" If she is out, she will probably explain. If not, just tell her that you are questioning yourself, and she may well say. (I have no idea what you mean by "gaydar gun", by the way...)
Are we using the metaphor gaydar gun now? Interestingly violent, I seem to be imagining a stereotyped world in which this gun fires plaid shirts at lesbians, anyway... Perhaps you could bring up the topic of relationships, using some kind of gender neutral term that she can just fill in with a response about her past (assuming she's had relationships before). Or pay her a compliment and read the facial expression with which she reacts: with men for me its more of a 'that's nice' smile and feeling, rather than a big smile or coyness because 'oh god this girl thinks I'm hot'. I think ultimately though the only sure fire way (totally did not intend that to be gun related!) is to ask. To bring it up during a conversation on interests and life, and say 'Are you into girls or guys?' If she identifies another way, such as bisexual, pansexual, then she'll probably correct you in her answer.
Before asking the question on here I looked on YouTube and that's what they called it. So if I offended anyone that wasn't my intention just trying to figure out the best way to approach the situation. Thank you for your reply. I think it's very reasonable and not to out there! ---------- Post added 19th Apr 2015 at 03:30 PM ---------- Like I said before, I didn't mean to offend anyone with the "gaydar gun" but I didn't know what to call it and I'm still very new to all the terms in general. Thank you for your reply. I also like your response. I think when talking to her I'll use gender neutral terms since I don't want to come on too strong. Thanks again
