Hi I'm 20 and so far I've only dated and had sex with girls. My last last break up was last summer. More and more I feel very curious about what it would be like to kiss a guy, go on dates with a guy, cuddle.. My fantasies (or whatever you want to call them) don't go further than oral sex at the moment though. So I am just really confused about all this and really have no clue how to deal with it or what to do. I don't have a problem with gay people at all. But I would still feel somewhat uncomfortable talking about this with someone I know (does that make me weird? I don't know). Anyway, I just would like some advice/ideas on what I could do about this? Anyone been in a similar situation? If I really want to experience what it's like to get intimate with a guy, how should I do that? I mean, I don't know if there are many guys who'd like to be a "guinea pig" for my sexual orientation? How could you bring that up, when you meet someone? I don't imagine it being a nice situation if I'd find out I don't like it all. I mean I don't wanna harm someone.. I'd just be happy about some nice words
Don't sweat it too much, man. I'm definitely attracted primarily to guys, but I don't really know if I'd feel comfortable doing things with other men at this point. I can imagine things, but it doesn't mean I'd like them in real life. The point I'm getting is that these things are confusing for all of us, and that it's okay.
Hey AltJ, welcome to EC! No, it doesn't make you weird! We grow up looking at sexuality as being something forbidden and distant from us, especially homosexuality. So, unfortunatelly, it is normal to be uncomfortable. First of all, don't rush anything. If you are still unsure about this, take it slow. If you want to tell a friend, then do it, but you don't need to tell anyone if you aren't confortable with it. Take some time to think about yourself. Do you feel attracted to women? Do you feel attracted to men? You don't need to experience it to know if you are attracted or not to men. Just like straight relationships, a straight men doesn't have to experience sex with a women to know he is attracted to them. You could go to a LGBT bar/club, but i wouldn't recommend that for a few reasons. First, because you may not indentify yourself with that scenario, and you may think that means you aren't attracted to men, which isn't dependant on going to bars, so you may end up confusing yourself even more. Second, because if you want to take it slow and keep it a secret, at least for now, you would expose yourself this way. My biggest advice, in resume, is to take it slow, and think about it. A little, a lot, whatever is best for you. If you can talk to someone about it, that's great, if not, that's ok too. We are here for you, if you want to talk more about this or if you want to meet the community and chit-chat. Welcome :]
I know just how you feel. I've only had crushes and been in relationships with men in the past, but I'm curious about being in a relationship with another woman. I sometimes have fantasies about dating, cuddling, and even having sex with a girl, but I've never actually been in a relationship with one. I agree with Chiroptera. Just try to relax, take it slow, and think about who you're really attracted to. Good luck.
Welcome! What you're feeling is completely normal for people just exploring their sexual selves. It's part of the process of opening up to a part of yourself that's unfamiliar and perhaps unknown until now. Take your time... there's no rush, no reason to dive into anything, and no reason to say you need to be comfortable with any particular sexual act in order to explore your feelings. I think you'll find that an awful lot of people here at EC have been where you are.
