I'm rather closeted and I don't hang out with lgbt ppl much. I'd like a girlfriend but I am shy to ask and afraid I'll be bad at it because I'm afraid of what my family and society will say. How did you find and ask out your first girlfriend? What makes a gay relationship really last despite social pressure?
Hey Foxfeather, This thread may help you: http://emptyclosets.com/forum/famil...king-relationship-simpler-than-you-think.html OH, i LOVE that thread. Too bad it is a bit outdated. (Boyfriend in my case): I already knew him, he entered with me on the university im in. Back on these days, he was openly gay, but i wasn't out yet. A few years later (2, to be exact), i came out. I had him on Facebook (he wasn't my close friend, but we spoke a bit when he was in Biology too, before he left, and i messaged him on that time to organize exercises and that kind of stuff), and i noticed he was posting some things about League of Legends, Doctor Who, and some nerd stuff i like. I already though he was handsome, so i started chatting with him about these things, and we started playing LoL together. One day, i was complaining to him online (Facebook) about not having a boyfriend, and how hard it was to find a gay person in my city that is interested in a relationship, and he said: "Man, if we weren't friends, i would try something with you..." . I said "oh, i wouldn't mind that..." and he answered "wait, you are serious?". And thus it began. We laughed a bit at the subtle situation, and we decided to go on a date. We had a 1 year relationship Love. I wanted to stay with my boyfriend, because i loved him. Fuck society, i don't cared about what people though about us.
Most of my ex-girlfriends and I met online, became good friends to some extent, and then I just confessed feelings. They either go with it or they don't. But in general, the relationships sucked for them because we never met in person, thus not lasting. I barely know any people IRL as I never leave the house so It's harder for me. My current crush is also someone I met online but we have had IRL contact multiple times, so I'm hoping this works out.
My first girlfriend and I had been friends for 3 or 4 years. We were both bi curious and had never had a serious relationship with a girl before. We talked for a while and came to the decision that we want to try dating each other. It went fairly well. I had to break up with her due to religious issues with my parents. For the social thing, we just told who ever asked and ignored the people who weren't supportive.
Ask if she would like to go get coffee with you. Easy as that. It can be hard if one of you is more out than the other, or one is more comfortable with touching in public. Good communication and being there with support for each other is so important. Now days it is so much easier as more people are supportive and accepting, such as friends and many family members, unlike when I grew up where being gay or lesbian was a way to get kicked out shortly or beat up. You have to be each others shelter and stand up for each other. If you are solid for each other, it will work. I have been with my partner/wife for 11 years now.
Deviantart, actually. Art is what attracts me to people and I'm sadly turned off by people who aren't invested in my writing which is harder to find offline
I got to know her through a mutual friend. We went to a party together. Well, we got along wonderfully right away from the start and we had a good connection to each other. But we never really had a date. We just saw the other often while meeting our mutual friend and going to parties or just hanging out. But after a longer time we both kinda realized that it is more than friendship.
Well, for me, the girl I liked confessed her feelings first. She was supposedly straight, and I hadnt come out to her. Anyway, we were very close..when we saw each other, we'd get all cuddly with each other and both of us loved it. I didn't want to tell her I liked her because it would ruin our friendship. So, I used to always call her my sister, every time I said something that sounded like I liked her...I always covered it with "like a sister, of course" one day, we started kissing each other, everywhere on our faces but the lips. A few hours later, she confessed she liked it and she had a huge crush on me. I then came out to her as bi, and told her I liked her too : 3 She is really amazing. I know we're only thirteen, but we have had a very strong connection and relationship...and dream of staying together for a long time. Personally, I fall in love with people I know very well, and who make me happy, like her.
