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Romatically attracted to her but she is sexually attracted to me

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by elizaraine, May 5, 2015.

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  1. elizaraine

    elizaraine
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    I am in college and I have been in a relationship with my girlfriend for the past 3 years. She loves making love to me and it makes her feel on top of the world but to me it does not mean as much. Like as if I have no emotional investment in that aspect of the relationship. I know I am romantically attracted to her and I have been ever since I met her, but I just have no attraction to her or anyone sexually. Even after the first time I just do not feel anymore interested in it than I did before. But she loves being that intimate and she sees me as being the same way. I am not sure how to get her to understand that it doesn't mean the same to me as it does to her without her getting the idea I do not love her because I do with all of my heart. I just feel like something is wrong with me and I'm confused.
     
    #1 elizaraine, May 5, 2015
  2. Invidia

    Invidia Guest

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    You might be leaning to being asexual? Or just not a major sexual interest at all? Or is it just with her?
    I suggest be honest with her. Gentle of course, but honest. Tell her you're okay with it, but if you feel it doesn't mean as much to as it does to her and you feel you want to tell her, do so. Maybe hold her hand, and look her in the eyes.
    There's certainly nothing wrog with you, and we're all confused sometimes.
    hugs
     
    #2 Invidia, May 6, 2015
  3. elizaraine

    elizaraine
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    Thank you for the hug! And I feel as though you are right about leaning toward asexual. And it is not just with her. I was in a relationship with a great guy in high school and I felt the same way with him. I jist never considered it different or somehow uncommon. Didn't realize there was anything different about how I felt versus how he did or my girlfriend now feels. Nice to know nothing wrong :slight_smile:
     
    #3 elizaraine, May 6, 2015
  4. rockpapersizrs

    rockpapersizrs
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    I would just be super honest with her. :slight_smile: It's best that she knows how you feel. Hold her hand and be very kind when talking to her about it. Hope it goes well!
    *hugs*
     
    #4 rockpapersizrs, May 6, 2015
  5. elizaraine

    elizaraine
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    Thank you very much for the advice!
     
    #5 elizaraine, May 6, 2015
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