Honeestly I have n idea what my deal is and I have no one in my life who can relate or give any real advice. So I'm spilling all the gross details to the internet and hping maybe someone can gve me a straight answer. I've been questioning this for a while but this issue is really stressing me out and I culd use some help from the internet please. So I've identified as bi for a while but I'm not sure if thats right. I've had relationships with boys and I've had relationships with a girl. With the girl we were more sexual than romantic and there was a lot of making out and stuff invlved. It was all a lot of fun but I was horny through some of it. I just didnt get that thrill that people talk about. With boys, I always have a lot of fun flirting with them but once the relationship moves anywhere towards romantic or sexual I freak out. I get really uncomfortable and start avoiding them. This happened to me at dance a few nigths ago where I found a guy I really liked. We hooked up but I found myself hating it and then afterwards I just didnt want to be around him anymore. But now when I think back on the memory it turns me on???? So I have no idea what is going on with me I though maybe I was asexual because I dont really get attracted to people and I dnt think about sex that much. But at the same time, when I'm doing intimate things I do get turned on and stuff and I've had serious crushes. Idk man, idk
It's easy for some people to figure out their sexuality, and not easy for others. I (and perhaps you) fall in the latter category. It's an ongoing journey for me, but I'm in a much better place now than when I first joined this site several years ago. Some things that have helped me: 1. Don't stress too much about labels. Reality is infinitely complex and labels like "straight," "gay," "asexual," "bisexual," etc. are just humanity's attempt to give some semblance of order. Labels such as these are best used to help give others a rough idea of your sexual orientation, or to help you relate to others or feel like part of a group. But you don't have to feel like any particular label fits you 100%. Use the label that feels right, that seems the most accurate for you. If none seem to fit, then just say "labels are for soup cans" and just be you. 2. I know it's hard, but try not to overthink things. The fact that you have relationship experience is great. I was trying to figure these things out before I'd dated a single person. Now that was hard! It might seem counter-intuitive since human beings are problem solvers, but thinking more about the problem won't necessarily bring you to a solution. I'm gradually becoming a believer that the only way to really know yourself is through living, through experience. I hope that helps, I wish I could make it easier for you!
