Am I a lesbian or bisexual? I'm a 19 year old female and I've just come to terms with the fact and realization that I do like girls. I didn't even truly realize it until recently. My whole life I've been with a guy. I've kissed them, dated them, had sex with them, had crushes, but I've never felt connected to any guy I've ever met. Somethings always been missing. Since I was about 13 I started watching porn, and have always been into lesbian porn. I can't "get off" watching anything else. But I thought this was just a normal thing that everyone else does and I've never thought too much else about it. Around 16, I started thinking about what it'd be like if I were with my best friends at the time who were girls. I never went through with it because I knew they wouldn't bat an eye at something like that, but whenever I was around them I got so aroused in a way. I thought they were not only attractive physically but their personality was something I was interested in as well. Then I came around Tumblr (a blogging site) & started following these lesbian blogs and I realized then how open some people were and it made me a little less afraid to accept that I really do like girls. This past year, I haven't been with anyone (guy or girl) for over 10 months because I don't know what I want anymore. Ever since I can remember I've always been with guys, but recently I've been much more open to being with a girl. Not just physically, but in a relationship as well. I've never been with a girl, kissed a girl, or haven't met a girl yet that I truly have a crush on mainly because I was always too afraid of the idea. Now, I'm very interested in trying it out because like I said before something has always been missing when I'm with a guy, and I can't shake away my feelings for girls anymore. I don't know what to do.
Hi There! I totally understand your confusion! It has taken me years to figure out that my attraction to women is not just a passing phase or random crushes. I have recently admitted to myself that I am bisexual as I find men and women attractive. If it helps you, don't label yourself. I have a friend who just falls for whoever she falls for and it may happen to be a man or a woman. I like the idea that gender is immaterial really!
