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So... am I really bi?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by sapphiregirl, Jun 1, 2015.

  1. sapphiregirl

    Regular Member

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    Hi all. So, I'm new here and just need a little help. I'm 20 and have always thought of myself as straight. Everybody I know thinks I'm straight. But over the past couple of years I've been seriously questioning myself. I've only had one boyfriend before and I've dated/been intimate with a few guys. I've never 'experimented' with another girl before.

    When I was 17, I began feeling intense emotional and sexual attraction towards my female teacher. I had never had such intense desire for anyone before. I honestly think I was in love with her, and these feelings grew stronger over three years. I couldn't tell anyone, because it was wrong (she was my teacher...) and God, it was hard keeping it to myself.. A few years have passed since then and there have been certain other women I've had feelings for. Right now, I feel very attracted to one of my female managers. She's beautiful in such a unique way, and I get home from work and just imagine what it would be like to kiss her.

    But, I feel like the experience I had of secretly being in love with my teacher and having to hide it made me very repressed. Because of this, now whenever I like a girl, I feel like I have to hide it. How do I escape this pattern in my mind?

    I'm also very attracted to men (actually dating one right now). I'm just confused. When I begin feeling attracted to a girl or guy, it's always physical and emotional attraction, not just lust. Do you think I'm bi? I'm tired of having feelings for people I can't have, and the endless thoughts/desires that attach to that. It feels right to identify myself as bi, but because I've never actually been with a girl at all, does it mean I'm still bi?

    Am I bi? I wouldn't be having feelings for girls if I was straight, right? When is the right time to tell my family and friends? What do I do...
     
  2. Jax12

    Full Member

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    It certainly sounds like you're bisexual. How is your relationship with your boyfriend? You are correct on feelings for the same sex; straight individuals don't exactly feel that.

    However, with that said, gay/lesbians experience little to no attraction to the opposite sex.

    Take your time to sort out your feelings. From what you provided I think you're bisexual but you know yourself better than anyone, so that's my 2 cents.
     
  3. sapphiregirl

    Regular Member

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    Thank you for your response :slight_smile: I don't have a boyfriend exactly, we're still at the dating/seeing each other stage but it's not official yet. I'll see how it goes, but I will definitely be taking time to work out my feelings :icon_bigg