Background: i realized about 4 years ago that I am bisexual and have been pretty comfortable with that. however, i've only had relationships with guys (4 years ago when I realized that I'm bi I hadn't ever been with a girl at all) After this, I started trying to date girls, and had a few successful dates/stints with girls, but nothing that turned into a relationship. then suddenly I met a guy, we clicked, and we've been dating for 2.5 years, and live together. I've dropped hints to him a few times about the fact that i find girls attractive, and i think once or twice i've hinted that i've also been with girls. but i dont think he fully understands how far i sway on the kinsey scale (i always get 5 when i take tests online...which FEELS right....but i feel like i'm lying saying 5 because clearly i have had more than "incidental" interaction with guys since ALL my relationships were hetero...so i tend to say 4) I know our relationship won't last much longer (maybe another year...?)...but I find that I'm just anxiously waiting to start my life out as gay (/bi....but lately i'm thinking i'm more and more just gay). Summary if above is too long: I am in a hetero relationship (for 2.5 years, live together) although i'ts clear it will not last. (we both know we are moving at the end of our work stint overseas and when we do, that's pretty much the end of our relationship). I find myself just waiting for it to end so that I can date a girl already...but I don't want to necessaily end our relationship just for that right now (i AM happy with him). We're living overseas and don't really have much of a social life outside eachother. I think I'd just be miserable and lonely here if we broke up before the move back home. SO...onto my question: should I tell him about all this? explain just how bi/gay i think i am and make sure he knows that i plan to solely date girls after we break up so that it doesnt shock him later? OR should i just go with the flow, and just be happy day to day not thinking about the future for now, and deal with this when the time comes...when we're both moving and breaking up? I'm just ready to be out....and REALLY anxious to date a girl. Just doesn't seem like it will happen until I move back home anyways...so why end a good thing...right?? maybe not...help!
well - i'm 90% sure it would be whether or not I was questioning myself right now. and due to me wanting to date girls afterwards I'll bring it up that extra 10% no matter. but like I said, I'm pretty sure it would be anyways. we've been together 2.5 years and have never said 'i love you', even though we live together. we've never had a serious conversation about our relationship. we also talk about our futures, like where we each want to go after here, and they never include eachother. and we don't want to go to the same regions of the country even. so i'm pretty sure we're clearly on the same page regarding that.
Just wanted to bump this up - Posted this a few weeks ago but never got too much advice/opinions. I haven't really acted on this too much yet...just kind of trying to not think about it for the time being... any advice would be very appreciated
It really just depends on whether you want him to know about your sexuality. Are you comfortable with telling him that you're bisexual? If it's going to end and you both share the same idea like you said, it probably wouldn't hurt to share the fact that you're bisexual. Has he shown any signs of sourness towards the LGBT community? Going with the flow is another option so it really just depends if you would feel more at ease with yourself if you just do you or if you want to be open with others.
