As you've probably seen on my other post i been questioning if im not really straight cause i watched transsexual porn but i keep thinking im attracted to women which ive been for 20 years and never have been turned on by a man but idk all this porn and testing to see if i get turned by the transsexual porn sometimes i masturbate to it to say if i ejaculate but i dont think i've ever been truly erect by wanting it but when i do ejaculate i get start questioning myself like"Yeah that was your sign you are gay or bi" but in real life i dont think about it i just get turned on by women but maybe im just making up excuses
I feel the same except the opposite. I've been sure I am gay for years and decided it was time to come out, but that I would check straight porn first. I was slightly aroused as at the end of the day sex is always slightly erotic. I'm now paranoid I like women and find myself eying up women but never really feel anything. I think its the same thing, just continue with what you know (you are straight) and see what happens. I'm still struggling too but give it a go, I'm feeling better already.
Different for everyone i think. For me, it was quite healthy in a way although i would classify myself as bi so that might be why. never saw men as an option because never met one who was abailable and blew my mind, so it was quite easy to bat away the thoughts that i wasn t fully straight, especially since i was attracted to women then 'he' walked into a room, and i had no choice but to admit that i am definitely not straight! 'he' on the other hand deals with everything/denial very badly...so different for everyone. caveat: i may be more than gay than bi so could still be in denial. very hard to know, but answer will come with time i think
Love your user name Crunchy :lol: Are you familiar with the Kinsey scale? Bi-sexuality is a continuum of different levels of attraction to the same and opposite sex. I personally identify as bi-sexual with a stronger same sex attraction. Over time I may identify as gay. It's a journey of discovery, so don't be too hard on yourself.
In my opinion denial feels different for everyone. For me it's shame - I'm total filth. Then comes "why me", why I'm I not like everyone else, you know normal. Third level down it's hungering for a guy (I'm male) and not knowing why. Hope this helps.
Please go through this resource available in EC Resources! Stages of grief --> Stage One: Denial Although feelings of different people in these stages might not be exactly same, you will get general idea from this page. Hope it helps!
Porn isn't a direct indicator of your sexual orientation but it can reveal some of the bigger picture. Especially for men porn is a "means to a release" and many things that wouldn't ordinarily turn guys on can do the trick in the privacy of their own home. As for what denial feels like, I sum it up as anything and everything I ever thought or did that could be considered gay was explained away, no matter how ridiculous the explanation. I wasn't the stereotype, my friends are straight, fantasies meant nothing, I'm only 'experimenting' with guys, it's just a phase, liking dick just makes me different but not gay, I haven't met the right girl yet... One day the list of excuses got too long and I moved from denial to anger.
Im not sure if I went through denial, but I certainly went through a lot of confusion. Denial to me would seem like denying something I knew was true to myself. I honestly had no idea that I would be gay. I knew I wanted guys though. Masculinity was so alluring, while the slim body of a woman would look very nice but I wouldn't get a boner from it.
