Turned on by women, afraid of dicks, but in love with guys...wtf

It seems like many women who are probably lesbains feel pressured to be bisexual because it's more socially accepted. Don't be bi if you don't want.

 

Yeah that.

I used to identify as bi but never had a sexual fantasy about men. I don't hate cock and I'm not scared of the schlong, but I certainly don't like it.

You are young - don't rush into getting the label right. Experiment, play, dream. Labels will be sorted out later for the moment just enjoy your youth.

 

If bisexual feels right to you right now, go for it. Uneven attraction, equal attraction, shifting attraction, all are possible... Take time to figure out what works for you and any partners you choose to have.

It's possible you don't want to be with men sexually, or you might just be on the young side and not yet ready for that. I'm pretty inexperienced sexually (you can read more on my blog), but I think I am bi with a stronger attraction for women. I'm also married to my hs sweetheart (and attracted to my hs bff - so I'm kind of messed up) and generally happy and satisfied.

 

I'm bisexual. Some days I find myself really into girls, other days really into guys. I have a boyfriend who is so accepting but sometimes I'm not sexually attracted to him and I find myself questioning our relationship. Then the next day I can't wait to see him/touch him/be with him. Often I hate the idea of a penis anywhere near me (and honestly it never does anything for me) but I love the man attached to it... I didn't know for sure I was bi until I was about 20. I started questioning when I was about 14. It's very confusing.

I have one word of advice that you should really consider. IT DOESNT MATTER. Let yourself crush on whoever you crush on. Watch porn of whoever you find attractive at the moment. Notice a hot girl and turn around a notice a hot guy. Find someone who's personality turns you on and don't worry if their male or female. Sexuality is VERY fluid. Let it be and go with it.

 

I definitely see a lot of me in your post. For the longest time I thought I was straight: I grew up having crushes on boys and liking them from a very early age etc... but I ended up experimenting with some girls as a teen and while I wasn't necessarily attracted to them, I found myself enjoying the experience which definitely made me question myself. I was young though and it was easier to go on as straight so I kept identifying to people as straight (even though it did felt like a lie at the time) but I could secretly notice my interest in women raising even though I could only imagine myself sexually involve with them but not dating them, so like you I suppose.

It took me 4 years to acknowledge and accept my attractions towards women as a part of myself and my sexuality and I only very recently started considering dating a woman as something I would do and it's now actually an option much more appealing to me than the one of dating a man. :lol:

Actually while I always had crushes on men etc... I have always had a hard time wanting to be in a commited relationship with one (probably due to some very bad experience with men who affected my trust in them) and the thought of a penis or doing things to one doesn't turn me on, I am not scared of them per se, but the thought of one is more of a turn off than a turn on yet I do fancy guys and I do have sex with them without a problem, so I wouldn't be worried about that too much.

Each bisexual lives his or her sexuality differently, some have a a strong preference for one gender or the other, some fancy both equally and others switch from one to the other all the time. That's my case. There is time in which I fancy men and not so much women while at other moments my eyes will only be set on women to the point that I'll almost forget about men. To give you an example that will answer your last question, from the age of 14 to 18 I was exclusively attracted to women to the point that my former experiment with girls was totally brushed out of my mind as a simple phase and I was sure I was straight. But at 18 I met a girl who changed everything, we had that amazing chemistry and attraction towards each other and I totally would have gone for her had she not had a boyfriend (she was bi) that's when I knew that I wasn't straight and that I started considering women as an option and since that I haven't looked back hahaha. But yes till very late I thought (or at least persuaded myself) that I was straight (even though now looking back I can clearly see stuff that growing up should have given me clues) so this may be your case.

If you feel like the label ''bi'' fits you, then go for it. There is no rule that says that you can only call yourself bi if you plan on being active with other women. You absolutely don't have to date women if you don't feel like it and it won't make you any less bi or any less part of the community if you don't. So use the label that you think fit you and forget about what others may think (or not).

Good luck ! :icon_bigg

 

First off, labels don't define you, you define labels. Secondly, maybe you could be biromantic, meaning you would, say date someone but only hug and cuddle, no sex. Sexually, you could be bisexual or straight or maybe even pan. Im pansexual, and there are lots of pan people on the site. Pansexuality means that if your attracted to someone you are attracted to them. From a more formal standpoint, its being attracted to all genders, including those out of the binary.

 

It may take awhile for you to sort this out. I consider myself bi, but I have a fairly strong sexual preference for men and a fairly strong romantic preference for women. I've felt romantically for one man only and been sexually attracted to only a couple of woman really. I feel I could have sex with anyone I'm in love with, male or female. Anyone else out there like this?

I'm content with my sexuality.