1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Do you have to find men's bodies attractive?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by SteveMahanahan, Jun 26, 2015.

  1. SteveMahanahan

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2015
    Messages:
    16
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    texas
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Straight but curious
    Hey guys! I've been hanging around this forum reading posts and such, and everyone seems really cool, so I'd figured I'd join and pick your brains if that's okay!

    Oh, and a big congrats to everyone who can legally get married now :thumbsup:

    Anyways, I'm writing here because I'm trying to figure out my sexuality, and I'm hoping someone here can give me some advice, or just be able to relate I guess?

    I'm a guy, and I always thought I was straight until about 20. That's when I first fantasized about men, and I'm not sure what triggered it to be honest. Up until that point, I had exclusively gotten off to fantasies and videos of women, as well as dated and hooked up with them.

    Then I discovered gay porn, and here's where it gets tricky. I can't tell if I'm actually gay/bi or sexualizing anxiety/fear. The only thing that gets me off when I think of men is being penetrated. In fact, most of the time if I'm fantasizing about being penetrated, it's not even a specific guy. I almost feel like I have a "rape" fantasy that some women do, and I can't tell if what's getting me off is the feeling of having no control, being dominated, etc. And if so, I'm wondering if in some way, these fantasies are a way for me to feel as if I have some control over my inadequacies if that makes sense? Kind of like, "If I want to get fucked, then the bigger, stronger guy than me isn't really better than me, because I want this."

    I wonder about this because I've never really felt attracted to men's bodies. If you put the sexiest guy in front of me in his underwear, I probably wouldn't think anything of it. And this confuses me because on here a few times I've read your sexuality is about who you are ATTRACTED to. I just feel like when I'm out and about, I never think of guys that way or really feel attracted to them. I've also read that another indicator is who you look at when you are out, and I still find myself looking at women.

    I've actually tried hooking up with men to figure this out, and realized the only thing I enjoy in real life also is the being penetrated aspect. The guys I was with always wanted to kiss, caress, etc., but I got nothing out of it. In fact, kissing another guy kind of feels weird to me, whereas when I kiss girls, as soon as it hits that "passionate" point, I get really turned on.

    So I guess I'm wondering what actions are most indicative of your sexuality? I enjoy kissing women, looking at them, feeling their bodies, and having sex with them (not that rough sex though, I prefer slow and sensual.)

    Whereas with men I don't really like kissing, get nothing from looking at men's bodies, but am turned on by the idea of being penetrated.

    I'm also confused about how a person can go their entire life fantasizing about one sex, having sex with them, and then one day it just change. I don't think my earlier feelings were invalid, I do feel that they had that "desperate" feeling to them, I would do whatever I could to get to the computer, watch lesbians, then clear the history to make sure mom and dad didn't find out.

    Any advice would be appreciated, this has been bothering me for quite some time. Thanks!
     
  2. Xander27

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 25, 2015
    Messages:
    81
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Idaho
    Hey!

    So I guess some things to ponder, because only you can really know about your sexuality,

    But you might actually be strait. If I'm understanding you correctly, you seem to only he attracted to women, but enjoy being penetrated so that's what's making you question. That to me sounds strait, and something to consider is you don't have to be with a male to let you have that penetration.

    Example from my life, (I'll keep the details as sparse as I can while making sense) I used to think I was a lesbian. While I was identifying as lesbian, I did enjoy being penetrated but I never slept with a man. My partners and I would use dildo's or strap ons, excluding the one relationship I had with a trans woman where everything sexual just kinda worked out.

    Like I said, only you can know, but generally if you're not looking at men, if their body's don't turn you on, and you don't want any kind of physical relationship outside of just sex, that sounds strait to me.

    ---------- Post added 26th Jun 2015 at 01:14 PM ----------

    Hope that helps!
     
  3. SteveMahanahan

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2015
    Messages:
    16
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    texas
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Straight but curious
    Appreciate the reply Xander!

    Interesting point...I do think I would enjoy doing that with a girl. I think for some reason it just never clicked as an option because I assume it's not something most girls would be into.

    But maybe I'm wrong? :eusa_danc
     
  4. Xander27

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jun 25, 2015
    Messages:
    81
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Idaho
    You never know! I have a couple of male friends who seem to be in similar situations as you, preferring women but being interested in being penetrated, and from their stories that include WAAAYYY to much information, I've been led to assume that there are a decent amount of women who are into that with guys. I know a lot of lesbians enjoy using strap ons.

    As far as most girls, probably not. But I'm sure there are some girls in your area. Good luck! And I'm glad I helped even a little bit!
     
  5. Fallingdown7

    Fallingdown7 Guest

    It's possible that you may just have a penetration fetish, but are straight. You don't sound gay at all from what you mentioned (since you are attracted to girls).

    In which case, you should look into pegging fetish (woman penetrates man with strap-on) which are more common than you'd think. There are straight men who love it too. They just love the pleasure of prostate stimulation and have zero interest in men.