I consider myself pansexual because I believe I can be attracted to people of all areas of the gender spectrum, and as far as I've been told (and correct me if I'm wrong) bisexual means being attracted to both male and female alone? It's actually quite confusing because some sources say this is the case, whilst others state bisexual is being attracted to your own gender and another gender? In any case, I've always felt reluctant to call myself bi because of the implications of me being only attracted to binary male and female genders, which is not the case. Anyway, being pansexual is often described as being attracted to someone irrespective of their gender identity, but is this the same as being gender blind, and does pansexual consist of both? Whilst theoretically I do not believe I have a gender preference, I don't consider myself gender blind because an individual's sexual organs may impact my desire to be in a relationship with them at a period in my life. But is this not more sex blind/lack of sex blindness? because gender and sex are two entirely different things? And does my capability of liking all genders, but potential preference to one or the other make me in fact not gender blind? And therefore should I still consider myself pan? Basically, my question is whether pansexuality means gender blindness, or non-binary gender tolerance- or both? And maybe also a clear-up of the whole bisexuality definition. Many thanks in advance, and sorry for rambling!
I'm just as confused as you are. @__@ Everyone seems to have their own definition of what it means to be pansexual. You have your own definition too. There aren't really any rules. Trust your gut and try not to let the internet confuse you like it confused me.
This is why I try to avoid labels and just describe my sexuality, gender identity and romantic orientation when it comes up/people ask. ---------- Post added 6th Jul 2015 at 11:08 PM ---------- But no, having a preference for a gender does't change your overall orientation.
Well, for pansexual, there are a few definitions. One of them is gender-blindness which is when sexual organs are not a factor in attraction. You said, "sex organs may impact your attraction in a certain part of your life" Do you think you could be polysexual? Attracted to many but not all genders. For example, you want female sex organs with no gender preference, so you could date many non binary genders, or a cis female, genderfluid person who is biologically female, bi gender...etc., but then you wouldn't date someone who had male parts. Way I define bisexuality: being sexually attracted to both sexes, which you may have a preference for one sex over the other. Sexual/romantic orientations can differ. I'm probably super confusing, sorry if I am
Sometimes choosing a label is as much about your audience and the message you want to convey to that audience as it is about personal introspection. Flirting with an attractive transgendered or genderqueer person? 'Pansexual,' being explicitly inclusive, may be the better option. Coming out to a stranger or casual acquaintance and don't feel up to too many questions? 'Bisexual' will be the more familiar term for most people, and doesn't necessarily, despite its etymology, preclude non-binary attractions. And if it's someone else sharing their identity with you, by all means remember that the definition that matters is theirs.
People have already given great advice already... But, the way I see it is you will feel better about one term, and that feeling may change over time. I like bisexual because it is simple, and familiar. My orientation is not however, simple that is. My "bisexual" can be entirely different that your "bisexual." If my definition excluded anyone under the genderqueer umbrella, I would be excluding people of the same gender as myself. And I am definitely attracted to demiboys, tomboys, and genderfluid people. But I am also attracted to girls, and some boys. I'm not "gender blind" in my attraction, and I'm attracted to 2 or more genders, so I felt bisexual best fit me. Pansexual requires a lot of upfront explanation to some, and since many people's orientation is unique to themselves (kinsey scale, romantic vs sexual attractions, etc.), a person could end up explaining a lot. Just something to keep in mind.
