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Confused, Scared, Frustrated- 23 year old Virgin

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by anonymous622, Jul 7, 2015.

  1. anonymous622

    anonymous622 Guest

    Hi

    So, I am struggling a lot trying to figure out my sexual orientation right now and it is driving me crazy!

    A little about me- I am a 23 year old woman. I have never been in a relationship with a man or a woman. I guess I've always put up walls. The thought of being intimate and vulnerable to another person scares me. Because of this, I am still a virgin and have never even been kissed. I've never been on a date with anyone.

    I've been attracted to men before, but now that I look back on things I think I have been attracted to women too. It gets complicated because I have had low self-esteem and a bad body image so in the past I've always justified looking at women as being jealous/ desiring their body because it's what I want to look like. Now I'm just not sure.

    I think I have had a crush on some women before, but I never knew it at the time. I really liked them and wanted to be around them all the time, but I thought it was just a close friendship then. Also, when looking at celebrities and stuff I have actresses I really like, but never even really pay attention to the men.

    To make things more complicated, I have been raised in a very strong Christian family with my parents and many of my aunts/uncles/cousins all being pastors. I have been raised to believe that homosexuality is wrong and fear that if I am gay/bi my family would disown me. I also am a Christian myself so this is all very difficult to understand. What if I end up going to hell? I really just don't know!

    Any advice or wisdom would be greatly appreciated! Thanks!
     
  2. my2895

    Regular Member

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    well if your worry about going to hell, don't be because all religion in the world are sending the other to hell and if we go by that logic were all going to hell so let forget about the things we know nothing about and focus on reality and the real world.
    also you don't have to come out to your family if you feel they won't accept you, is not mandatory to come out to everyone with a belly button.
    as for your insecurity I can related, do what I do and go with the flow if you date a girl then good or if you date a guy then good, don't worry about too much, you are young with plenty of time to figure out what your feelings are.