Which of the 'new labels' mean "gay" and which "bi"? What is "gay" these days?

This is my problem with all these new labels as well. It'll make it so difficult for people learning about themselves to figure it out because all these new things popping up without much research or confirmation these labels need to be used. Im sure many people feel differently about it because that's their experience and I can't tell them what label they are, aren't, can or can't be. It divided the community even further apart when that shouldn't be, we are all after the same thing, why be offended by all these labels you know? I'm all for people labelling themselves as they wish, I just don't like that it can make someone's learning process unessesarily complex.

Sounds like you should call yourself gay/lesbian. If you can see the appeal of guys but feel like you have to force being sexual than that is gay. You don't have to prove that to anyone.

The biromantic means you can be romantically attracted to both sexes while homosexual implies you only are sexually attracted to the same sex. It doesn't particularly seem needed to add biromantic because no one needs to really know that. You can like guys but if you don't want to be sexual with them relationships would be difficult. So you're gay it would seem, to me.

I apologize to anyone if I've offended you. I don't have anything against anyone who uses any label (maybe things like otherkin though, that's a bit absurd).

 

You seem a bit obsessed with this topic, and you really shouldn't let other people's perceptions of identities invalidate your own. There are different shades of homosexuality and bisexuality.

 

I'm really sorry you're going through something like this. Also, to clarify my response wasn't meant to offend or blame. I actually related to you at one point as well when it comes to rigid definitions, but for different reasons (I used to hate the word "virgin" for example because straight people defined it as "never had hetero sex" which made me anxious and made me refuse to have any sexual encounters with women since I was afraid they'd still consider me one). However, with enough help and work I was able to move past my issues and realize that my definition was the one that mattered to me and to not let other people's invalidation of my experiences define me.

It is hard though and it takes a LOT of work to become comfortable enough to yourself to the point where you can accept your sexuality and stop doubting. Unfortunately, we can't change rude people or their opinions, but we can spread awareness and feel comfortable with ourselves and our own definitions of ourselves (and to help others who have been hurting for similar reasons) *hugs*

 

(First things first: I am not here to argue and am, understandably, quite exhausted on this topic.)

Self-identification may be seen either as a tool or as a right. Obviously I see it as a right, but I'll see it as a tool for a moment.

As far as sexuality goes, in its most simple form, the labels that pertain to an individual's sexuality is a way to express outwards what one's sexual feelings/preferences are.

Obviously, feelings are complex phenomena and cannot be fully covered by one label, in the sense that nothing is absolute. For example, if a lesbian says "oh, that guy was cute", people might says she's not "really" a lesbian. Which is not true. Because her feelings are mostly/only for girls and she identifies as a lesbian.

But let's say that same lesbian person found guys a little cute and could consider sleeping with a man if offered for sensational pleasure, and doesn't feel like lesbian suits her. She might then sport a label such as homoflexible or "gay but curious".
If she calls her self homoflexible, she might have to explain to others what that means, and might even be ridiculed, or receive less support because the word is foreign to people and people fear the unknown.

On the other hand, if she would prefer the label to be not entirely descriptive but use a label that fits okay if not perfectly that more people know about to make recognition easier, such as lesbian or bisexual, she could do that.
As for me, I mostly identify as bisexual when I'm around people IRL, because it's easier. On here, however, where there is more awareness and people know what it means, I use pan because it's more accurate. I might also add something about romance later when I've got that thing more figured out.
Also, awareness about some of these labels can grow in the future (I mean, it did with "gay" and "bisexual".)

As I see it, the dilemma inherent to this discussion is whether an individual is best off prioritizing accuracy or recognition.
Which one of those the person should prioritize is, in my opinion, up to the person.

 

My feelings on the topic are fairly indifferent. I feel that labels are totally subjective things that can mean one thing for one person and another thing for another person.

That said, I don't think it's wrong to label yourself whatever you want, just so long as you realize that not everyone will know what you mean or even agree with you. The first issue is easily solved, when I see a label I don't understand I always ask the person what they mean and what pronouns they would like, problem solved. The second issue is much more complex as everyone's requirements for legitimacy are different, some require scientific confirmation, some require that you can explain the label in a coherent fashion and others will never accept certain labels. So long as no-one is causing severe harm then there's no problem in people having whatever opinion they so desire.

There is certainly the issue of recognition too, more obscure labels might fit better but ultimately will have more misunderstandings than more generic labels, as Becki said, it's up to the individual which is more important to them. I really don't think that the relatively small number of people using custom-made labels will have a negative effect on the gay community as a whole though, that said I know a lot of MtF/FtM people who refuse to call themselves transgender and instead call themselves transsexual because of how almost anyone can call themselves transgender irrespective of surgery. To those transsexuals the trans part is just a description of a medical condition they need to treat with surgery and nothing more.

You don't have to pass a test to use a label though, it's just subjective. My position on it is go for the label that you want, figure out if recognition or accuracy is more important to you, weigh up the pros and cons of both then roll with it.