I'd hoped after coming out the questioning would go, and it did at first, it was like a weight off my shoulders! But recently I've been looking at men for the first time in my life and wondering if they're attractive to me or not. I try and imagine being with one, and it feels much safer, but then I think of kissing one or having one who wants to be close, and it all feels wrong. With women there is a definite attraction, and when I see the right one I feel flustered and shy. I've never really liked men in that sort of way during my life, but I'm scared that I'd have to come out as straight or bisexual and that doesn't feel right somehow. At the same time though, I can think, 'he's good looking' or 'what would my reaction be if he asked me out?' And I honestly don't know the answer. I think it might just be me over thinking things and trying to analyse it all, but who knows? I know one thing though: I don't have the same er... sexual curiosity that I do with women?
As human beings we notice when someone is attractive, regardless of gender. Science says that we do this in order to find a mate and notice competition. On a more relatible note, I'm have similar problems. I look at women and wonder if I'm really attracted to them or not. The only thing I can think of that would help is to break it down. Stop and try to figure out why you're attracted to the person in question. As for if a guy asks you out, just answer. Your panic mode will figure it out for you. Good luck!
There's a difference between finding someone attractive and being attracted to them because you can find someone attractive, but you still may not be attracted to them. Finding someone attractive is feeling as though someone is objectively beautiful or appealing, but not wanting a romantic or physical bond with them, being attracted to someone on the other hand is often romantic or sexual, in which you desire an emotional and/or physical relationship.
