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can it possibly be a phase?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by el229, Aug 15, 2015.

  1. el229

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    I'm pretty sure that I like girls, at least more than I like boys, but is it possible that in a few years I'll identify as straight?

    I've had one or two crushes on girls but none on boys. I'm fifteen.

    When I was little I didn't understand why people dated and stuff when they were younger. I never had any interest in anyone. I assumed that when I would go to college i would find a guy who I liked, but until then I was completely content.

    I was just wondering, is it possible that it's a phase, and that I'll eventually like guys exclusively, if at all?
     
  2. flitterpad

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    If you've shown no interest in boys then you are probably lesbian. Apparently when you go through puberty it is possible to start liking girls as well as boys and that it is just a phase, but some people think thats true and others don't. I suppose thats probably the major reason why I'm not sure whether I'm bisexual.... in case its just a phase.
    But if you've never shown any interest in boys I think you're most likely gay. :slight_smile:
     
  3. brainwashed

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    Human sexuality is fluid (dynamic) specially for females. (documented I'm not making this up nor is it my opinion.) This specially means as time changes so do you.

    Additionally because of your age, location, and upbringing you may not have been exposed to sensitive/human boys your / near near your own age.

    My advice in a nut shell, don't worry about labels, live life as it comes.

    Later
     
  4. cate1515

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    My advice, coming from a 32 year old who has recently come out as a lesbian, and is in a complicated mess me and my girlfriend (who was also my best friend, one day we just realized we were in love with each other and that isn't going to change), and since we both are married to husbands and have children it is a huge emotional mess right now. We both had completely unhappy marriages we both admit we settled for to have a family. We want to start a new life together, and be happy because we realize this is the life we were meant to live, but its beyond complicated trying to get husbands to separate from us peacefully and avoid nasty custody battles, etc.

    I never for a minute regret the marriage because if it hadn't happened I wouldn't have my son, and my gf feels the same bc her 2 children came of it. We wouldnt change that for the world. Also, both of us were teenagers in a time this was FAR less accepted than it is today. I may have suppressed the fact that I would have rather been with a girl and forced myself to be with guys because I was "supposed to".

    My point is, if you force yourself to be something youre not, eventually it will haunt you. Much as I know we had to live the path we did because it gave us our children our greatest blessings, it is hauntingly difficult for us right now because everything is so complicated. Its as if we are trying endlessly to "undo" our mistake of pretending to be straight so we can live happily.

    Im not saying that your feelings for girls mean that you are 100% a lesbian. It might, but it might not. Maybe you are bisexual, or bicurious. That's something you need to figure out. But you need to not be afraid to face the truth, whatever that may be. I was. But things are different now, than they were 16 years ago when I was in high school.

    Good luck and I hope you find happiness whatever that may be. :slight_smile:
     
    #4 cate1515, Aug 15, 2015
    Last edited: Aug 15, 2015