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Should I come out as Bi or Lesbian?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by grungeteen, Aug 30, 2015.

  1. grungeteen

    Regular Member

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    I'm very confused.

    I like girls and boys and there is no doubt that I am attracted to men but I'm only interested in having a relationship with a girl (atleast for now). I want to come out when school starts (one week or so) but I don't know whether I should come out as bisexual or lesbian. If I come out as lesbian, I feel like it will be easier to find other girls to possibly be with if ppl think I'm only interested in girls but then again, what if im wrong about my 'only girls' thing?

    The only reason that I am questioning coming out as lesbian rather then bisexual is that for some reason, I'm more comfortable with being called lesbian and identifying as a lesbian partly because it feels like my attraction to girls will be taken more seriously and not just be seen as one of those 'fake bisexual teen girls' you get a lot these days.

    But if I say I'm lesbian, everyone close to me will be really confused or doubting as I have always been quite openly 'boy crazy' as in I am constantly like 'he is hot' etc.

    To make matters worse, I have a boyfriend although I haven't spoken to him for several weeks while being on holiday. I think im going to break up with him because I realllly want a girlfriend and as I said earlier, I'm only interested in girls at the moment (relationship wise).
     
  2. Lin1

    Full Member

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    I think you should come out as a bisexual, after all you are a bisexual girl and there is nothing wrong or shameful about that. Yes some will consider it a phase and won't take you seriously and there is a chance that you'll have to deal with biphobia from some lesbian girls. But at the end of the day is it the type of people you wanna date? Do you want to be with girls that undermine your sexuality as well as other bi-people ? I know I wouldn't.

    You also have to think that no good relationship will ever be founded on lies. Right now you have a stronger attraction to female ( I do) but tomorrow you may feel more attracted to guys and what will you do then ? 'come back in the closet' ? Cause by doing so you are more likely to be seen as someone who was just going through a 'lesbian phase' than by telling your friends that you like both and will possibly end up with either. Who cares if they think that's a phase ? You know it's not and if you are confident about it, people will be. :slight_smile:

    Good luck !