I'm an 18 year old girl who grew up liking boys. I never questioned my sexuality and felt happy with that. I was even comfortable watching solo woman porn and lesbian porn and still was confident I was straight. Now I'm not so sure. It started earlier this year when I thought a girl in my class was pretty. I didn't want to date her and still liked a few guys. I started watching lesbian porn more and for a while it got me off more than straight. I started to feel really confused and paranoid. I still do. I have no ill feelings towards the lgbtq community but I'm scared of turning out gay. Ever since my long distance relationship ended with my ex I've been feeling like I'll never meet a guy. I would obsess over my sexuality, wouldn't eat, wouldn't sleep all night. That's gone away but the thoughts haven't. I still notice guys and get butterflies if a guy I like flirts with me. Same with the guy I like that I hook up with. I love being around him and when I'm with him I never question my sexuality, yet as soon as I go home I start obsessively thinking about it again. I won't deny that lesbian sex turns me on but I can't tell if it's what I want. Sometimes I'll notice girls but it always feels forced, but now I can't tell if noticing guys is what is really forced. It feels like I'm losing who I am. The idea of giving up guys upsets me a lot. I just don't know what to feel anymore and some advice would be really great.
