Growing up I'd always just kind of assumed that I was straight but a few years ago I stopped identifying as straight. I think I might be bisexual. I've been thinking a lot about it recently and looking back on crushes throughout school I've had a lot of crushes on girls and I've had a lot of crushes on guys. I remember in school I would not say things about girls I thought were pretty because I didn't want people to know that I liked them or think I was gay or whatever. Freshman year I had a really hardcore crush on this girl and it was one of the three biggest crushes that I've had. One of the other big crushes I've had was a girl in 5th grade. I really really liked her for two or so years. The other day I made a list of classmates I remember having a crush on and the list was pretty evenly split between male and female with few more male crushes. Another thing that happened recently is during a trip I went on with a straight female friend and a gay male friend we played this game where we'd point out pretty guys to each other and I kept seeing pretty ladies but I wouldn't say anything about them to my friends. And the other day I went to the store and there was a really cute girl cashier and I kind of got butterflies. I also remember in 8th grade thinking "what if I'm gay" and I remember telling myself I couldn't be gay because I liked guys. All of my friends think I'm straight because it's pretty easy to just never mention that I find girls attractive too but I don't really want to have to be careful to not mention it. I've been wanting to talk to some friends about it but I feel like I'm just making this up or something. I don't know why I feel that way. I just feel like somehow I'm making all of this up in my mind and this is how all straight girls feel? Anyway if any of you have any advice or anyone has had a similar experience let me know?
I am not certain if you are but if you are bisexual I would say your almost dead middle in the Kinsey Scale by the way you describe it to me. A Kinsey 3 is equally heterosexual and equally homosexual. You could be a tad bit more of a hetero leaning bisexual like 2.5-3. A Kinsey 2 is predominantly heterosexual but more than incidentally homosexual. I am more of a gay leaning bisexual and i fall between 3 and 4. I am like roughly around like 3.33-3.71. A Kinsey 4 is predominantly homosexual but more than incidentally heterosexual. However though I have somewhat more of a homosexual predominance I think two women are even more beautiful than two men.
This is extremely similar to what I went through, at least the emotional process of it. I'd always liked boys but as the years wore on I started to notice girls, and I fought with myself on it -- 'no, I can't like girls, I like boys'. or 'If I like girls, I can't like boys. It can't be both'. If you are genuinely getting crushes on both genders, those butterfly feelings -- I would say you are bisexual. Whether you lean toward one gender or the other, that's perfectly ok and normal. I've had crushes on men, predominantly, though as I've discovered myself recently I've been having romantic feelings toward women as well -- and as soon as I acknowledged that about myself, I've felt much better in general. :] Hope that helps.
Thank god Im not alone in this mess I have inside my head.. I have always sort of assumed that Im straight but also thought that it wouldnt be impossible for me to be bi or lesbian. I have never has sex or dated anyone seriously but I feel like I am sexually attracted to both boys and females. And very recently I was out drinking with my friends and I have this friend(girl) who I have always thought that is very pretty and sort of sexy too. So she was also there and then I sort of realised that I want to kiss her and when she went to spend the night with this guy she has a thing with, I was extremely jealous. So no Im thinking my head off about it, that if I really like her or is this just something that stuck in my mind because I was drunk or what..?!?! Im starting think that Im bi, because somewhere on this site someone said that you should think both genders naked and if you are psychially attracted to both of them, theres a big possibility that youre bi. I hope you can find some answers to your life too! Ps such a shame that the girl Im possibly crushing on is quite surely straight..
Being bi is a disorienting thing for many of us. I agree with other posters that you seem bi, but at this point it really is enough to know that you are not straight. That is the first step I had to take. Another person on this message board said a good test is, who do you think about when you are masturbating? Men or Women? (If you don't masturbate, or think it's unnecessary, it is actually very beneficial. Just because it's easier for men to do it, doesn't mean that we women shouldn't do it! Part of the reason I came out so late in life is because I neglected that aspect of myself and I should have been paying attention to it. Please write on my wall if you want to talk about that, but I rant... ) Life is tough enough, and for those of us on EC it can be even more challenging. But I urge you to take the steps to self discovery, and explore how you feel when flirting with men vs. women. You owe it to yourself to live a happy authentic life being YOU! Bi people may never have the answers they are looking for, or the answers they want, but keep discovering as much as you can about yourself!
