This is a brief little reassuring note to all the people here who are trying to figure out where they are on the sexuality spectrum. I hope this helps ease some of your anxieties. Sexuality is fluid. It is not something set in stone at the moment of your birth. It is not something that results from one life experience. It's a part of who you are, and it changes, just like many other parts of your identity, as you age and grow and develop your independence. There will be times in your life when you are completely 100% gay and the thought of being with someone of a different gender appalls you completely. A few years later, you might find yourself attracted to all kinds of people. At the next turn, you could decide that you need a break and be single and celibate for a year, and just focus on you. Sexuality changes - not just our orientation, but also our level of interest. It comes and goes in cycles. Because of this, there's no need to stress about labelling yourself. You don't have to put a name to your orientation if you can't find one that suits you. If none of the available titles feel right to you, just say that you're queer and go be with whoever you want. Labels are not for you. They are for the people around you, who want to put everybody in neat compartments and categories so that things make sense to them. You don't have to categorize yourself to make things easier for others. Plenty of us don't fit in any of the boxes, and that's okay. We can make our own, or we can hop around visiting the boxes casually for awhile, hopping into one and then another. There is nothing wrong with changing. That's what makes us human. Just relax and be who you are. Love who you want to love in the moment, and know that your preferences won't always be the same. All that matters is that you are healthy, happy, and satisfied, and names have nothing to do with any of that. (&&&)
