Hi. I'm looking for some advice on ex's. So I dated this girl for 3 yrs. once we broke up we both went our separate ways. Now 3 years later she wants to come back in my life I have not spoken to her or heard anything about her for 3 year besides she was living with her then current gf. Now she is asking for me and wanting to talk to me. I don't know if I should let her back in? Please help! I want to hear from someone different than my friends and family.
Hello Princess92008. Is she looking to be your friend or something more? Is any of you in any relationship currently? It would also help to know if you both had ended the relationship on good terms and the reasons for the break up. It would help to not rush into anything. Three years is a long time so if you do wish to connect, take it slow. Also depends on what each of you want the same or different things at the moment.
I agree with the above post, we need a little more info on how it ended and what they want out of this possible reconnection. Also, trust your instincts, if something feels off ask about it or let them go.
Thank you for your advice and here is a little more history. Long story short we broke off because she wanted to have "time off" and I at that time was getting ready to get promoted at my job and move not far it was a 30 min commute. After we broke up we kept talking to each other until she met some other girl. Right away she stop talking to me and just disappear we had mutual friends and she didn't talk to them either. From what her best friend told me was the new girl made her change her number and not allowed her to talk to her friends. So after that I didn't bother getting intouch. I went on with my life and dated thru out the years but she was always in the back of my mind. So now I'm single I don't know if she's single or why she wants to reconnect.
Well, from the dynamics that you both share, do you think, *you* would want to reconnect? If you do wish to explore the path again, ask her the reason as to why she wants to reconnect. It is upto you though, would you want to date her again or be friends or just catching up if you harbour no ill. If you feel that you don't at all want to go reconnect after all that happened, that's your choice. Three years (apart) is also a long time and people mature or change. So if you do wish to explore any possibility, you could take it slow and see where it goes. But if it doesn't feel right to you, go with your gut.
Thank you so much. You have been a very big help I'm just going to go ahead and talk to her and see what she wants out of it. I will keep you updated to see what was that she wanted. Can't thank you enough
No problem, can't speak for myself123 but I've been in that same position where an ex wanted to reconnect.
As much as I agree that there is little harm in seeing what the purpose of her wanting to reconnect is, just be careful and stay guarded. It's easy to lull back into what you once had, even if it was so long ago. People can be pretty manipulative, so just keep an eye out for it. My ex (dated for four years, have been broken up for 1 1/2) got into a new relationship immediately after our break up, uhauled, and now is texting me randomly, baiting me to ask questions that I don't want to ask--so I don't. Don't let her make you feel a certain way until you are sure of what you, alone, want to do. I'm all for optimism, but with a hint of skepticism.
