Bisexual homoromantic (I already got the label down): Being physically/sexually attracted to both genders (or all, depending on binary-ness), but only emotionally/romantically attracted to the same gender. I believe this is what I am. I would love to identify as a lesbian, but I feel somewhat obligated to call myself bi, because that's technically what I am. However, for some reason, I am very uncomfortable with labeling myself as bi. I don't know if it's because it's truly not what I am, or because of compulstory heterosexuality, or if this "fear" is brought on by internalized biphobia. The thing is, I don't think I'm biphobic. I was raised very liberally, and I couldn't care less who people are or what they identify as. I've met several bi/pan people at camp in the past couple of years, and I saw them the same way I saw everyone else. But when I call myself bi, it feels wrong. Perhaps this phobia occurs because I'm scared of people assuming that my bisexuality is 50/50 (it's more like 80/20 to girls), or do I have biphobia-phobia? (Quick background: I'm in high school and I've never been in a relationship with anyone. I notice girls more often than not, and when I look at guys, it's usually to ask myself if I COULD find them attractive. When thinking about my future, I picture myself with a woman.) I've seen a lot of people on here identify as hetero/homosexual and biromantic, which is, in a way, the opposite of what I am; is anyone else in the same situation as me? If so, in a word, would you call yourself gay or bi?
I'd call myself whatever made me most comfortable! For me, that's 'gay'. Technically speaking, I'm bi/pan and yet here I am, constantly referring to myself as a lesbian, or 'gay' if I'm not up to the inevitable question of using an obviously contradictory label. I'm definitely not biphobic - I ID'd as bi for a really long time, and will still refer to myself that way if it's more convenient. I think bi visibility is important! I just don't really jive with the label myself these days. I'm in a similar but not quite the same situation as you - bi/pansexual as all hell, but whether or not I'm interested in guys romantically (and occasionally sexually) is subject to serious fluctuation. Sometimes I'd definitely be technically homoromantic. So yeah. Don't label yourself something that you don't feel comfy with because you feel like you 'have to'. Go with what is comfiest.
If you feel like you can find guys sexually attractive but you can't get involved romantically with them, then I think homoromantic bisexual is the label that might fit you best. I can see, though, that it might not be simple to explain, because a lot of people still think that there are only three sexual orientations -gay, straight and bi- although there are many more, as we know. Many homoromantic bisexuals usually go just with "gay", to make it quicker and easier to explain, but it's more a matter of you being comfortable with yourself. For example, I used to identify as a lesbian, but now I'm starting to think that I might actually be homoflexible. No one around here, though, knows what that means, so in order to make it simpler I just go with "gay". What matters, though, is that I know what I am. As said in the previous reply, go with the label you're more comfortable with
