This Can't Be Happening! I Don't Want This TO Happen!

Hey, hey, it's okay (*hug*) There is absolutely nothing wrong with exploring your sexuality.

Liking a boy doesn't mean that you can't like girls too! (you could be bisexual or pansexual).
There is also a difference between sexual attraction and just thinking somebody is "nice looking". I mean, even straight girls can talk about how pretty other girls are, but they're still straight.

 

Sexuality isn't always black and white. I'm physically/sexually attracted to men, but I've come across some girls who I've been crazily attracted to. They are just gorgeous, I just want to grab them and kiss them. However this is rare, it doesn't happen much. In the end of the day, my sexual preference is men but I don't label myself.

You could just be aesthetically attracted to him. Another words, you might just find him very handsome but there is no sexual desire for him. I don't think that would change your feelings for girls. I think it's best to just go with the flow and consider that sexuality can be complicated and sometimes fluid.

 

I agree with Null.

 

I can relate, I too sometimes feel nervous around guys. Particularly cute ones. However, like Null said, it doesn't mean you can't be Bi or Pan! It's entirely possible that you're Bisexual, but strongly lean towards girls. (with a cute guy once in a blue moon)

It's also possible that in "trying" so hard to be/remain a lesbian (not the best choice of words, I admit) repulsion may sometimes turn to attraction. I find that if I'm calm and not bent upon consistently proving to myself that I belong in the LGBTA community I find attractive men, well, less attractive then I normally would.

And lastly, as others have said before, maybe you just thought he was aesthetically pleasing and confused it for a crush. Just because you see a pretty object doesn't mean you want to marry it. haha.

Ultimately it doesn't matter what sexuality you are. Nor should it. You shouldn't feel pressured to fit in either the gay or straight community. You should just be you. If you really want labels, ask yourself these questions:

a) Can I see myself marrying and loving a woman?

b) Can I see myself marrying and loving a man?

c) Can I see myself marrying and loving a nonbinary/genderfluid person?

The answers you give will tell you a lot about yourself. c:

Good luck on your journey of discovery! (cheesy but fitting I think, haha)

 

It's not a phase, even though some people might say that a lot (funnily nobody says to the straight teenager that their sexuality is a phase). Your questioning period is valid, and whatever you discover your orientation is, label or not, you will and can find a way to be happy with who you are.

And also, you can totally be head over heels for a guy and that doesn't invalidate your attraction to and interest in girls at all. Even if you're not sure, just let yourself feel attraction or feel whatever it is when it comes up. Eg you see a cute guy, just acknowledge it and be like, wow, he's cute. And keep going. No matter what you feel for one gender it doesn't mean what you feel for another gender has been invalidated or is now less significant.

 

If that is how you felt, then that is how you felt! Just because you thought you could have been gay doesn't mean that you can't discover/rediscover yourself. And that is perfectly okay.

I heard this analogy a few months back, and I think it applies here.

The moon always goes through phases, but just because the phases pass, doesn't mean that they weren't real. Correct me if I am way off mark here, but maybe you felt something for a woman and started to reexamine your (what I assume was) your original heterosexuality. You shouldn't be "afraid" that your questioning was just that; Questioning. What is there to be afraid of?

 

Acrid,

Those questions are the same questions that some asked me when I was totally confused if I was gay, bi or strait or just to much into sex.

a) Can I see myself marrying and loving a woman? this ended up a yes

b) Can I see myself marrying and loving a man? this ended up no because after long deep thought about the question (like 2 weeks worth of thinking) i came to the conclusion that for me it was just the sex, but then there came another darn question attached to that finding. I then realized weeks after that, that it wasn't just the sex, it was the fact that when i was having sex, I wasn't me, but I was my female inside that was pushing me. Once I came to that understanding, it was clear as to why for me with guys it was always casual, but honestly, sex was way better, and I bet it would be even best now that I understand why I liked it.

---------- Post added 24th Sep 2015 at 11:21 PM ----------

Actually what I forgot to add to my can i see myself loving a man is, No, not right now as a male, but if I could finally become female, than yes, but that would be a tuff road as well.