this has been bugging me and i would really really appreciate any input at all! i’m a 19 year old girl. first off, a question: would you consider me to be sexually attracted to women if I have a past history of being aroused by naked women (mostly breasts) and yet have no desire to date or have sex with a woman? conversely, i am in a relationship with a man whom i love very much but i am not interested in being sexual with him as often as he would like. in real life, i have only ever been aroused by two people - both guys, and both were once i got to know them well. however, the naked male body by itself really does nothing for me. so, second question: does it seem reasonable for me to identify as heteroromantic greysexual? or am i way off base here, and, like, a lesbian in denial?
I don't think you have enough data yet to pinpoint your specific attractions. At the moment you sound sort of bisexual. When you first start questioning it helps to just let your mind wander as you observe people and images around you to see what attractions pop up. If you are a lesbian, your brain needs a bit of time to accept it and then "re-train" itself so you become more sure of yourself. The societal default for all of us is man + woman. Other combos are perfectly plausible but we need to let our conscious selves know it, too. I think our subconscious already knows. I wouldn't bother identifying as anything. Just go with the flow and see who interests you.
