I'm a 19 year old male who recently came out to his parents and friends. I just wanted my close ones to know about my sexual orientation so that I could live in peace with myself. But… there's always but. I've always felt romantic attraction to women. Even now I do. While I was coming in terms with my sexual orientation, I thought that it must have been induced by the media and by the heterosexual medium I'm exposed to but even after I came out, my attraction to females is still there. Of course, I'm only talking about emotional, not physical attraction. Having sex with a woman or even kissing one is something I don't really want to try. However, I've never experienced romantic feelings towards another guy. Only strong sexual desire. This is obviously bothering me. I want to bond with a person both physically and emotionally but right now mixing these two kind of attractions is something I just can't imagine happening at all. I don't want to sound stupid, but I kind of want to be labelled. I want to know who I am and where do I fit. Can you help me figure it out?
I've been in a very similar situation. I had feelings for this guy and he did too, but I told him nothing could ever happen between us, because I'll never be able to go further with a guy. Whereas I can find myself romantically, ohysicily and sexually attracted to girls. I haven't fallen in love with a girl yet, but I know I wanna date a girl, and in my future I see myself with a girl. It might just be that you haven't found the right guy yet. The question is, though, would you see yourself dating a guy, being in a relationship with one? If so, I guess you can say you're also romantically attracted to guys.
I spent a good part of my life having hetro realtionships and getting married, and still found myself alone at times masturbating to me getting with men, and I have had my fair times with men. It became so confusing and such a huge issue that one day I had to ask the same question, am I gay, Bi, strait or just greedy? I didn't have in mind what was in store for me either once I opened that Pandora box, now I am in a new place of WTF, but it seems to be the right place out of all of them. The only way you will know if you can be emotionally attached to a male, is if you venture out to the gay scene, and see if that life style is really yours. You have to be able to differ your feelings from lust and reality, and of course media. Ask a few questions to yourself honestly, like, can I imagine myself loving and being married to a male? Can I imagine that if I was married to a male, can I see myself at an older age, with a male and adopting a baby? The answers are out there in our public, you just need to get out there and do your own social study on if that is what you really desire emotionally and physically. If it is just sexual lust, than there are plenty of alternatives, but you would do yourself a favor by letting whoever you are about to get in a relationship with that you have these desires or a fetish, and who knows, maybe she would be cool, or not.
